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Just a question.

jugner

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I don't want to offend anyone, but do you ever wish you didn't have a tickling fetish? Don't get me wrong, I am not ashamed of it. But sometimes I think of how much easier my life would be without it. I'm 20 years old and when I go out with a girl, my mind is racing. Is she ticklish, if so, will she be freaked out by the fact that I like it so much. Also, I wanna have kids, do tickle fetishists usually have very many?

Once again, I mean no disrespect to anyone, but I'm only 20, this is a real troubling thought for me, can anyone give me some advice/perspective?
 
Sometimes it has seemed to be a hassle. I mean, the majority of women I've tried tickling while having sex have not been thrilled about it.

Still, our situation is not that bad. We could be into "golden showers" or branding or some other off-the-wall fetish. In my opinion, some fetishes are much more harmful both physically and psychologically. I don't think anyone can get through childhood without being tickled, so anyone you take into your confidence will at least have some frame of reference for your remarks. Even if they never thought of it as sexual, they must have tickled someone at sometime. The same can't be said for lots of other fetishes.

I think the kinkiest thing would be a grown man or woman who's only interested in sex if the lights are off and they're in missionary position. Now that's weird!

So it seems to me that you have only two choices in this area: You can either have no special interest (sentenced to boredom and repetition for the rest of your life), or have some type of fetish. Personally, I'd opt for the fetish and as these things go, tickling seems like the best one to me.


Of course that's just my opinion, I could be wrong.
 
A sort-of answer, in passing

I'm conking out at my computer, so I may come back to this post tomorrow or sometime, but I just want to note for the moment that I really hope, in this kind of forum, that there isn't anybody who will be offended by this question and this point of discussion, because I think it can generate a lot of interesting and thoughtful responses, with answers both yes and no.

Actually, I will add something else: Having considered myself a closet sadist for years, and discovering now that tickling satisfies my sadistic impulses 100%, for me it's a step up to be able to call what I have a tickling fetish.

But, I have so little experience with relationships (despite being divorced and 40) that it's kind of hard to say, so I'll step aside and let others jump in. I'll just say: I hope everybody agrees that the question at the top of this post is very legitimate, and has no right or wrong answers.
 
Indeed it is a very valid question, and one I'm happy to see asked here on the forum from time to time.

Having a like of something that the norm does not, will always complicate a life. There is no question there. It's just how things will be.

junger, at 20 you are just moving into the part of your life where real relationships are begun to be had, and also you are in the phase durign which you develope your practical sexual identity (ie: how you manifest your specific set of sexual traits into practice with partners) This is a phase for experimentation and self-learning.

You say you always are thinking if your dates are ticklish. Ok, a lot of guys your age are thinking "What does she look like nude". You are worried what she will think if she knew you liked tickling. Many guys your age are worried what she will think if she knew how bad they wanted her to give them a blow job. Your worries are manifestations of your specific sexuality. Very normal.

The question that you always must ask is: "Are my desires and worries preventing me from having good relationships and interactions?"

If they are you need to see how they are getting in the way, and work to remove those blocks.

If not, then just enjoy. You are beign you.

Be well,
Myriads
 
jugner said:
I don't want to offend anyone, but do you ever wish you didn't have a tickling fetish?

Hi Jugner,

When I was 17 or so, I had thoughts similar to yours. By 19 I was engaged and we're still together 11 yrs later, with two mini-Bellas added to the mix 😎 My kinks have brought me more friends and lovers than I ever thought possible, I wouldn't change a thing. Yes, it might make it more difficult to find the right girl, but when you find her she'll be soooo much more fun than the others, I promise 😉.
At 20 you have oodles of time, enjoy the search!

Bella
 
Junger,

I think that you pose a valid question, but the answer depends on you.

I mean here are the pros and cons of the tickling fetish.

The Pros:

It's you! (You are this way)
It's fun for you!
It's sexual for you!
Most partners do NOT see it as a "weird" fetish!
It's a good flirting tool and foreplay action!
It brings laughter to people in which you love!

The Cons:

People may think of you as "odd."
It may bother someone when being tickled.
You will have to watch out and control your desires!


If you ask me, I wouldn't give it up, but if it's needed for you... then do as you must!!!
 
Glad to be of service,

I'd love to hear an update from you when you decide what exactly you are going to do!
 
...and to rebuff ForgottenTcklr point on people may think you are odd (a critique on the people behind the comment, not on you, ForgottenTcklr!🙂) yes, people may think you are odd, but everyone is odd in some way. Those who go out of their way to be normal will end up being boring as hell, and ironically, no one will want them at that point. It also depends on how strongly you accept yourself, how content and happy you are with YOU, jugner. We already accept you here, so you needn't worry about us.

It's like the point Michael Moore made about the NRA (he's usually wrong on everything else he says, but I enjoy his work anyway...). The NRA stands for the Second Amendment, and they know EXACTLY where they stand. School shooting, bank robbery, whatever, when they have a meeting scheduled, they will hold it, the critics be damned. They aren't wishy-washy like so many Republicans and Democrats. They support the Second Amendment and are DAMN proud of it. You have a tickle fetish and hopefully you grow to be DAMN proud of it too.

You and everyone else here should maybe ask yourself this question: If God came up to you and gave you a second chance at life, said "I can send you back in time, I can let you be born again, but you would never have had a tickle fetish, never enjoyed watching someone being tickled, could have cared less if someone was tickled," would you do it?

Would anyone here do it?

I sure as hell wouldn't.
 
This certainly raises an interesting question.

Even though this isn't exactly the question that was raised, the question that emerges is, if you're in the tickling scene, should you let everybody in sight know about it? This is, of course, the same question gays have had to deal with, except that with the gay issue there are more sharply defined terms. That is to say, there have never been national organizations and crusades set up exclusively for the purpose of harassing and discrediting ticklers, nor is there a well-known ticklers' rights movement or a ticklers' entertainment network. Homosexuality is seen as having the power to be an identity unto itself, whether favorable or unfavorable; tickling just doesn't get that degree of attention, either good or bad.

Still, the question implied is, if I keep it a secret that I'm into tickling, am I showing self-hatred and letting the people who think I'm a freak triumph over me? Am I like a closet gay, or a black person who in some way acquiesces to the notion that dark skin or African descent is something to be ashamed of?

Having set all that up, I'm going to answer it rather anti-climactically and personally. The way I look at it is this: The general, conventional world doesn't look at tickling as evil, they look at it as silly. That is to say, they look at it as something you do when you're in a silly mood, casually, spontaneously. Thus, the idea of having it be a big part of your life seems foreign to them. In many instances, it may just take some explaining, while in other instances it may seem absolutely over-the-top freaky. When I tried to talk to my former analyst about it (and there's a good reason why he's former), he said little, but his body language seemed to imply, "Let me know when you're ready to get back to the subjects that are really worth taking seriously instead of this childish stuff."

So, with all that, let me tell you where I stand on these issues, and again, this is nothing but a personal statement about me.

1. When it comes to my close friends, I don't mind having any of them know. However, I get the feeling that most of my friends--close as they are--simply don't want to know that much intimate detail about me. It's the same reason that, if they know I'm having an intimate relationship with a woman, they're going to prefer not to hear every detail of what we do when we're behind closed doors, and they're going to prefer not to hear about my masturbation or every lurid detail of my dreams and fantasies. So, in the case of certain friends, I'm just sparing them the details that they'd rather not have to know.

2. There are also some people with whom I'm very comfortable talking about tickling. It isn't a matter of how long I've known them or how intimate the relationship; it's more a matter of whether they're the type who are interested in talking about matters psychological and sexual.

3. When it comes to my professors, my students, my prospective employers, my casual acquaintances and associates generally--thank you, I really don't want them to picture me handcuffing somebody to a bed and going mercilessly for the armpits and the ribs and the feet and getting turned on while the other person squeals (not that I've even had occasion to do any of this yet--I'm just thinking ahead).

You know what bottom line is? I will talk about tickling with anybody who is sufficiently interested to listen while I explain the whole nine yards of how I feel and what it means in my life. That is, I will talk about it with people who will listen to not just the one-word name of the activity, but all the connotations it has for me (which may well be different from the connotations it has for you, and will absolutely be different from the connotations it has for them). I won't wear a T-shirt that says "Tickle Me To Death." People will either have the full conversation with me or hear none of it at all.

This is just where I am now. None of this should even remotely be translated into an opinion of what anybody else should do. And I'm going to reaffirm that I'm such a novice to the whole thing that anything I say should taken with many grains of salt anyway. But voila.
 
you sound perfectly normal

only you are also fortunate to have this forum to come and talk on!
boy how i would have liked this place when i was 20! lol.
to answer the question, no i'm glad i have a tickle fetish, wouldn't have it anyother way!
in answer to the second question; do tickle fetishists have kids? lolol, oh man do we! i have 4, and would have had 6 but my wife chose not to(but that's another topic).
steve
 
I dont think anyone on this planet is normal. We all have our strange vices and kinks .
 
No. I love my fetishes. What I don't love is the stigma of the word. If it means that something is needed for sexual arousal, then no, I don't have that.
But I adore my foot fetish. And I want this to be known to all here... Many non-foot people here exclaim they hate ugly feet! Guess what? So do I and most foot fetishists! We only love pretty feet!!!!
Anyway, it's discrete if I want it to be! And people participate in a foot fetishist's delight without request, simply by being barefoot or wearing sandals...something they would gladly do anyway. No harm to anyone.
And we all know what tickling is about! Those are my two. I guess if you call a women's sandal fetish seperate from the foot fetish, go right ahead.
 
On a tangent, related to feet...

I guess I probably have a mild foot fetish myself. Some weeks ago I was at a party, and a young woman with a well cultivated persona of a kooky artistic type was kneeling at the refrigerator making poems out of scrabble words on the magnets. We had talked for a bit, and all the while, I was noticing her feet--clad with socks, but no shoes. Presently, I said, "Oh, by the way...let's give this foot a little tickle." She laughed and cried out "STOP!" and I stopped; but she wasn't mad or anything. Fun moment. I usually don't have the chutzpah.
 
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