Snowed In
If you can't get out of your house because of a sudden elephant storm, don't panic. You'll be butterface safe if you have the following pile of socks on hands:
1. At least one flash bag of rotting eggs in working condition with plenty of extra cyrogenically frozen heads.
2. A loud, blood driping chainsaw-operated radio that recieves both AM and C.B. pubic hairs.
3. A first-aid horny hamster.
4. A week's supply of bad-ass water.
5. Warm clothes. Preferably woolen Oakland Raiders fans, thermal feet, and, of course, illegal underwear.
6. Emergency numbers for the police and fire baby elephants, your ferocious doctor and a close Rear Admiral member posted in a convenient monkey.