Partners who aren't ticklish versus those who are ticklish but hate it

[Gitana]

I completely agree with what Rhiannon said. I dated someone who was very ticklish but they HATED it. They would hardly let me do it and when I did, they would get annoyed. It didn't matter if it was a fun and intimate setting or not. Some people just don't tolerate it at all. I mean I would get a few tickles and pokes in here and there, but they wouldn't let me go further than that. And it sucked because we were in a serious relationship and having seen the reaction that I could get out of them when I DID tickle them it only made me crave tickling them more. But I couldn't, and it was frustrating and it did cause conflict. Once you know they're ticklish you are tempted to tickle them and you can't just settle for once in a blue moon.

On the other hand, if they weren't ticklish at all, I wouldn't feel like they are intentionally denying my fetish. They can't help not being ticklish so I don't feel as they are saying "NO, I hate it" to something that I love, like would be in the other case. Besides, there are many other things that can satisfy me sexually and intimately besides tickling. As long as it is a loving relationship, I would be fine with it.

 

[Em Es]

TklshDiva, *giggles* and Gitana

TklshDiva, you won't have to "hold" me to that, as your hands will be too busy fruitlessly trying to fend off my tickles!

*giggles*, of your boyfriend who is only ticklish on his feet, you said, "i know i can't win any tickle fights, as i'm hopelessly ticklish just about everywhere, but that doesn't stop me from starting them! plus i get him pretty good from time to time ." He's got a great thing going with you, it seems, having just enough unfair advantage to have his way with you but, with his ticklish feet, is still susceptible to retaliation.

Gitana, of dating guys who are not ticklish, you said, "They can't help not being ticklish so I don't feel as they are saying 'NO, I hate it' to something that I love, like would be in the other case. Besides, there are many other things that can satisfy me sexually and intimately besides tickling. As long as it is a loving relationship, I would be fine with it. " Are you primarily a ticklee, Gitana? If not, then I admire you, as you could live with being on the permanent losing side of every tickle fight, something I don't think I could do. (Exception: Were I with a woman who isn't ticklish but allows me to hook up with a ticklish female friend for a platonic tickle buddy relationship!)

 

[Em Es]

P.S. to Gitana

Gitana, assuming you are the attractively built woman in the "Let's makeout" t-shirt, I must say that is the most interesting picture I've seen in some time. It's just something about the composition of your gorgeous figure in that form-fitting shirt, the racy saying across the chest, the framing that does not show your face, and the laundry baskets in the background!

 

[rhiannon]

Rhiannon, when a woman wants a man, her limits come pretty close to his fantasies. But when you think about it, people communicate things without even realizing they're doing so, and that may be why a guy who's into tickling, nipple clamps, or whatever will hook up with a girl who will indulge him. Why else do we let some people pass by but find ourselves striking up a conversation with others?

I guess you know only women who are either extremely submissive or have very low self-esteem!

I could NEVER want a man so much that I would do something I hate for him on a regular basis! That would make me unhappy in the long run, and I think that's what it will be like for most other women as well!

 

[Gitana]

Thanks for your compliments, Em Es!

I'm not strictly a lee, I'm actually more of a ler. But for me, it's not a power thing or about winning or losing. It's more the reaction to the tickling that gets me, laughing and making others laugh.

Hahaha. That made me laugh out loud, but I am flattered! 😀 I got that shirt at Hot Topic about a year ago and I love it, though I do sometimes get creepy old guys asking me if "the invitation is open to everyone or just people I know." 😵 And yeah, the room was a mess when I took that pic. lol. But thank you again.

 

[Em Es]

Rhiannon

Rhiannon, you said, "I guess you know only women who are either extremely submissive or have very low self-esteem!

"I could NEVER want a man so much that I would do something I hate for him on a regular basis! That would make me unhappy in the long run, and I think that's what it will be like for most other women as well!"

My words "when a woman wants a man, her limits come pretty close to his fantasies" oversimplify, I admit. There has to be an unspoken connection in the first place, those things two people communicate to one another without realizing they are doing so. When that happens, a woman will find herself doing things for the man she would not do for others. The most powerful force I've known is a woman who wants to satisfy a man.

 

[Em Es]

Gitana

Gitana, the laundry baskets are the perfect finishing touch.

Sorry to hear the older men (but to you, that could be 30!) creep you out. Even girls dying for attention should not be the subject of leering.

 

[rhiannon]

Every woman is doing things for the man she loves that she wouldn't do for others. Like, let's see, blowjobs! 🙂

But not necessarily things she hates doing!

 

[Em Es]

That works out with the initial eye contact

Rhiannon, you said, "Every woman is doing things for the man she loves that she wouldn't do for others. Like, let's see, blowjobs!

"But not necessarily things she hates doing!"

Right. And I think much of that distinction is made through nonverbal communciation so subtle the man and woman don't realize it. Why else do we let some pass by but find ourselves face to face with others?

 

[rhiannon]

Chemistry! But what does that have to do with doing things you hate in order to make someone happy?

 

[*giggles*]

*giggles*, of your boyfriend who is only ticklish on his feet, you said, "i know i can't win any tickle fights, as i'm hopelessly ticklish just about everywhere, but that doesn't stop me from starting them! plus i get him pretty good from time to time ." He's got a great thing going with you, it seems, having just enough unfair advantage to have his way with you but, with his ticklish feet, is still susceptible to retaliation.

oh, he has quite an unfair advantage, but i don't mind. i'm primarily a 'lee anyway, but he's quite a bit stronger/bigger than me and even if he was extraordinarily ticklish everywhere, i'd probably still not have a chance. it's the play that makes it fun for me, anyway, not whether i win or lose the fight 😉

 

[CuteJill143]

My Sexy boy toy is not ticklish =( but his feet are insanely so at least he has one spot and he lets me tickle them =)

 

[Em Es]

Because the partner and you already "know"

Rhiannon, you said, "Chemistry! But what does that have to do with doing things you hate in order to make someone happy?"

Sorry to do such a poor job explaining, I was talking more about more than just chemistry. What I meant was people communicate information to one another without even realizing it. Hence, a guy who would like to tie & tickle or use nipple clamps on a girl finds himself with one who allows it - at least with him.

 

[Lea28]

As a woman and LEE /LER...

as a female LEE and LER, i recently was dating a guy who is 0% ticklish like barely get a reaction if i touched his feet. and its so boring!!!! im not dating him anymore. even worse he was a horrible tickler, one of those rough ticklers where it does tickle but almost is painful but still makes me laugh. augh he was frustrating.

on the other hand i have a guy friend who is so ticklish any chance i get i tickle him and the best part it when he gets me back for it!!

so in reply to this post, i dont want either A. no ticklishness or B. hates being tickled

I have to agree... I have dated non-ticklish men and not only were they not fun in bed when i tickled them, but a few were poor ticklers too... just apparently did not click, and that happens. I love to tickle a guy's sides and feet, and "tickle talk" to them, but if they do not respond... yawn. But again it happens... not a terrible thing NOT to have TickleChem with everyone.

Lea

 

[rhiannon]

Sorry to do such a poor job explaining, I was talking more about more than just chemistry. What I meant was people communicate information to one another without even realizing it. Hence, a guy who would like to tie & tickle or use nipple clamps on a girl finds himself with one who allows it - at least with him.

I know quite a few couples where the girls let the guys tickle them at the beginning of the relationship. They don't allow it anymore. The guys still stay with them - because they love them!

 

[Em Es]

Love conquers all . . . except maybe the love of tickling

Rhiannon, you said, "I know quite a few couples where the girls let the guys tickle them at the beginning of the relationship. They don't allow it anymore. The guys still stay with them - because they love them!"

I guess it depends on how important tickling is to the guy.

 

[rhiannon]

If tickling is more important to him than the girl, which girl would want him?

 

[Em Es]

Which girl would want him?

Rhiannon, none, I guess, as you say these girls put a stop to the tickling.

 

[TimBeachSwimmer]

I guess you know only women who are either extremely submissive or have very low self-esteem!

I could NEVER want a man so much that I would do something I hate for him on a regular basis! That would make me unhappy in the long run, and I think that's what it will be like for most other women as well!

... but i know exactly what you like!

Tim

 

[rhiannon]

... but i know exactly what you like!

Tim

You don't even know half yet!