Single Ladies

[CapturedDoll]

What do you think is stopping you from going on some dates here with the Men from TMF? I see the complaints all the time... And I'm wondering what's stopping you from taking the plunge?

I already know location might be a factor. And meeting people on the Internet is not for everyone. And probably some Men I'm sure just are either too sexual in a first correspondence... Or maybe it's because so many Men AND Women are unwilling to show their pics. (I understand this but for me this group is so small in spectrum of poem it doesn't concern me. Maybe it should... But it never has.) That to me has to be off putting. So what would you say you are looking for if you had to describe what you want in a Man, and their approach? Maybe this type of thread might help some of you find each other! 🙂 I know for myself too as a Bisexual women who has a Boyfriend it's not easy to find someone into Tickling in everyday life. So even I am looking for knowledge in the Tickling arena.

Some of the Men that have approached me always bring something different to the table in their approach. Even though I can't play with them unless it's at future gatherings. It's a wide enough spectrum that always interesting. But the ones I enjoy the most are a well thought out mail... An introduction... A little bit of where they are in life's journey. What they do for work... What their hobbies are. This to me is a sign that goes beyond casual interest. And really wanted to form a mail that tried to give me some aspect of who they are as a person beyond tickling. But I enjoy most of the emails I get anyways.

One of the things that I don't understand is showing someone just a picture of their feet without a face also. Yes I love feet!! But... For me that's like showing a dick pic. It's a randomn body part and it becomes a complete disconnect for me. Like... Thanks but... What do you look like?? And wether I receive a friend request or mail. I look at the about section. Rare are pictures of the face. Fairly rare do people even tell their age. (Which I think should be mandatory. Am I wrong on this? it's been a while since I created my profile.)

All I know is I want everyone here to be happy and find the tickling partner that was made for them! So let's try to figure out how to achieve this! Also... Would it be better if you Ladies made the first approach? For me I prefer a Man to find me first. This is how I met my Boyfriend. He approached me at a BDSM Fetish party. But not all women are created alike. So... If you are looking for someone here... What would you like to see happen to meet some of your comfort requirements and overall needs in a partner. And what woulden't you want?

 

[marvelsm]

Well Captured Doll maybe ladies here are leary because of the sexual nature of this site also we are pretty spread out too so travelling can be a big problem.

 

[Ticklerguy4u]

What do you think is stopping you from going on some dates here with the Men from TMF? I see the complaints all the time... And I'm wondering what's stopping you from taking the plunge?

I already know location might be a factor. And meeting people on the Internet is not for everyone. And probably some Men I'm sure just are either too sexual in a first correspondence... Or maybe it's because so many Men AND Women are unwilling to show their pics. (I understand this but for me this group is so small in spectrum of poem it doesn't concern me. Maybe it should... But it never has.) That to me has to be off putting. So what would you say you are looking for if you had to describe what you want in a Man, and their approach? Maybe this type of thread might help some of you find each other! 🙂 I know for myself too as a Bisexual women who has a Boyfriend it's not easy to find someone into Tickling in everyday life. So even I am looking for knowledge in the Tickling arena.

Well from my experience showing my pic really didn't change much. I think women go by words not pictures, plus anyone that is willing to chat and get to know me is welcome to get a pic. But as I said...doesn't really effect female response.

Some of the Men that have approached me always bring something different to the table in their approach. Even though I can't play with them unless it's at future gatherings. It's a wide enough spectrum that always interesting. But the ones I enjoy the most are a well thought out mail... An introduction... A little bit of where they are in life's journey. What they do for work... What their hobbies are. This to me is a sign that goes beyond casual interest. And really wanted to form a mail that tried to give me some aspect of who they are as a person beyond tickling. But I enjoy most of the emails I get anyways.

Unfortunately, men outnumber the women which may cause some guys to feel ignored because she may not be able to answer all of the emails.
Then again even if a guy is friendly he still needs to say the right things or be chopped. That's alot of pressure...lol

One of the things that I don't understand is showing someone just a picture of their feet without a face also. Yes I love feet!! But... For me that's like showing a dick pic. It's a randomn body part and it becomes a complete disconnect for me. Like... Thanks but... What do you look like?? And wether I receive a friend request or mail. I look at the about section. Rare are pictures of the face. Fairly rare do people even tell their age. (Which I think should be mandatory. Am I wrong on this? it's been a while since I created my profile.)

well men are usually visual and assume women are too.

All I know is I want everyone here to be happy and find the tickling partner that was made for them! So let's try to figure out how to achieve this! Also... Would it be better if you Ladies made the first approach? For me I prefer a Man to find me first. This is how I met my Boyfriend. He approached me at a BDSM Fetish party. But not all women are created alike. So... If you are looking for someone here... What would you like to see happen to meet some of your comfort requirements and overall needs in a partner. And what woulden't you want?

In my opinion, I think its up to the females on here need to become more involved and a little less...*waiting* for someone to show up.

 

[rdhd]

Captured - well said. Were I a few years younger, and still single, good advice for an ignorant male (hey we know everything, and are the best at it all, right?).

 

[Sensualswitch10]

It would truly be amazing to be with a woman who was actually into tickling. But it looks like I'll be dating vanilla ladies and tickling the heck out of them as they try to figure out what the hell I'm thinking. Lol

 

[rdhd]

And, not that I'm a Beyonce fan, but what's that lyric?......"all the single ladies say...."

 

[robmic]

I will offer this "old" guys take... From what I gather reading many of the gals posts here, a lot of the younger guys are over exuberant and/or just clueless about how to approach the ladies here. And that seems to scare them. Rightly so. If I were a pretty young girl here and had guys bombarding me with requests to be tied up and tickled, how would I know if I could trust them? One thing I've learned in my years of tickling women, is that you can succeed in tying and tickling them by spending the time to get to know them, treat them respectfully, and don't be too pushy. Me personally, at my age, I would love to have a tickling friend. But it seems like it has become so hard even just getting to know someone here, especially at my age! Ideally tickling and sex of some sort would be awesome, but push come to shove, I'll take just the tickling. After all, I'm here because of tickling aren't I? The sexual part is just icing on the cake. It's not a deal breaker if it's not going to happen. I would even consider couple tickling... as long as the guy didn't look like a WWE fighter! And as far as complete pictures, there's a number of them in my profile. Not sure what else I could do to entice any woman here to partake in some tickling. Hell, I've even looked into tickling guys with some interest, though nothing's come of it yet.

 

[CapturedDoll]

Maybe it would help to make a video introduction!! In the personals section! That way when a woman is searching the personals... Obviously not everything can be said in a 5 minute clip but... at least it might help women or men have something more to go on... Coulden't hurt right?!? Videos are the thing to do now so...

 

[daddy]

Maybe it would help to make a video introduction!! In the personals section! That way when a woman is searching the personals... Obviously not everything can be said in a 5 minute clip but... at least it might help women or men have something more to go on... Coulden't hurt right?!? Videos are the thing to do now so...

Very good idea!!!

peace out,
daddy

 

[robmic]

Good example right here CapturedDoll. You asked a question directly to the ladies and how many responded? 0! And how many guys? 6! You can't even get them to talk here! 🙄

 

[Aeveirra]

I agree with you about having age be mandatory! Hah, and I agree about the disconnect with non-face pics, (also that feet pics are like dick pics) lol, good observation.

I'm a 23 yr.old female, ticklee, single and (mostly) straight. I'm more into guys, but i have dated girls in the past. Id say I'm about 70:30 male:female , preferences.

The thing that's stopping me from "taking the plunge" as you put it, is that yeah im nervous about meeting people from online. Especially if I don't know them well. There's all these horror stories of people being murdered, or abducted. I know it's a just a phobia, but that stuff does happen.

Most people I meet here live far away, and I'm not willing to travel out of state to meet someone from online I have never personally interacted with before. (And someone who's bent on tickling me)
Even though I love being tickled more than anything, it's still a pretty vulnerable situation id out myself in.

Also, I did not come here to the TMF to use it as a dating site.
I also did not want to set up sessions with people. I prefer to only be tickled by someone I'm in a close relationship with, or only by my real life friends I've known for years.

I think tickling is a very intimate activity., So The idea of meeting up with someone for a session, without any emotional connection is not appealing to me.
I only came here to make online friends, learn about the community, and use the discussion boards to make posts/ reply to others. Not to put myself on the singles market.

I'm not opposed to sending pics of myself to people I've met on here, but I don't want to publicly post them. This is after-all a "fetish-site". This may sound weird to some people, I but I think it's a sensible decision to not connect myself so easily with a site for my sexual interests (online for all to see.)

I've met people on here who really want to meet up in real life, but I'm just too nervous about it.
Plus, as I said I wouldn't want to travel out of state (or just, far) to be tickled by someone I don't really know, / am not dating.

So... I'm sorry to any guys who read this. I'll chat with you, send you pics of me, and ill answer all your private messages.
But Remember ; I did not join this site with the intention of finding a boyfriend.

 

[CapturedDoll]

Good example right here CapturedDoll. You asked a question directly to the ladies and how many responded? 0! And how many guys? 6! You can't even get them to talk here! 🙄

I noticed that last night lol. But one female just did and I'm thinking maybe women want to take their time in answering. To construct the best answer as they see it.

 

[CapturedDoll]

@Aeveirra I completely understand. Part of the reason I did this was so that the Men could get different answers they may not have thought of. I know a lot have self esteem issues and they need to know that reasons like yours have nothing to do with them. I want the Men here to feel better about themselves. One person I spoke with was suicidal. Over other reasons aside from tickling. So I thought it would be a good idea to try and truly open up and give EVERYONE different perspectives. Some people think they aren't getting a date because they are overweight, underweight, not good looking, shy, too this too that. And so for everyone here I want them to know the reasons someone has have usually nothing to do with who they are. But that... Maybe they might be going about the dating process wrong and have to adjust their thinking.

For a long time I always thought it would be a great idea to do a tickling singles speed dating type meetup. There ARE women here who are looking to either date or "hookup". But as I keep hearing the ratio of men to women is far greater... I'm just wondering how better we could maybe make it for people to find each other.

I myself love checking out different sites for a day just for fun. The minute I sign up I suddenly have 4 or 5 mails waiting for me. That always overwhelmes me because it happens so fast. The exception is here and tumblr. Someone said here that maybe it's the women that need to try harder. And maybe that's true. Maybe the Men here should stop sending mail for say a week and let women send the mail. Maybe a once or twice a year "Singles WEEK" type thread. How that would be established would take some more thought. I still like my video introduction idea and that could be incorporated into it.

 

[Sensualswitch10]

I know this thread is titled single ladies, but if I could give some advice to the guys who think they're too this or too that to get a date... If you only focus on the things you don't like about yourself, how do you expect that to work? Try not to worry about superficial stuff. Women care way less about that stuff than we do. Work on carrying yourself with confidence, even when you don't feel it. Most women respond to man who is confident. Make eye contact. Smile. If you go into a situation feeling like you're going to fail, you've already defeated yourself. Keep your head up guys! You can if you believe you can!

 

[SoleMates]

Also, I did not come here to the TMF to use it as a dating site.

But Remember ; I did not join this site with the intention of finding a boyfriend.

This right here I think is the crux of the issue. I don't think I've ever run into a woman who comes here to find a guy. Most of the more active posters don't even like to talk about tickling when they're here! The bulk of the women here are already in relationships and the few that aren't don't advertise it because they'd get swarmed even more than they already do.

I'm not a woman, but I wouldn't come here to find a date, either. A world-wide forum for a niche fetish where the male-female ratio is twelve jillion to one? The odds are horrible; assuming you can even find someone in your age group who's sensibly close enough to meet, you still have to deal with whether or not you even find one another attractive, same as any other relationship. You'll have infinitely better luck just going outside, and I don't mean to a local tickling gathering. The bay area meets I've gone to had some of the most uncommonly positive gender balance I've ever seen and the number of single, approachable women there was still zero.

 

[maniactickler]

I think its my breath.

 

[CapturedDoll]

Ran into this vid while on YouTube just now.

Women talk about Men's profiles:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=V-eIGWXpmX0

 

[CapturedDoll]

This right here I think is the crux of the issue. I don't think I've ever run into a woman who comes here to find a guy. Most of the more active posters don't even like to talk about tickling when they're here! The bulk of the women here are already in relationships and the few that aren't don't advertise it because they'd get swarmed even more than they already do.

I'm not a woman, but I wouldn't come here to find a date, either. A world-wide forum for a niche fetish where the male-female ratio is twelve jillion to one? The odds are horrible; assuming you can even find someone in your age group who's sensibly close enough to meet, you still have to deal with whether or not you even find one another attractive, same as any other relationship. You'll have infinitely better luck just going outside, and I don't mean to a local tickling gathering. The bay area meets I've gone to had some of the most uncommonly positive gender balance I've ever seen and the number of single, approachable women there was still zero.

WOW. This is surprising to hear. So maybe we can all assume that anyone that goes to tickle parties is for the play itself not to meet anyone. I figured it was probably 25% at least in the women's category for attendance. Maybe 5-10% looking for a life partner. I assumed California would be higher in this regard.

 

[CapturedDoll]

Well... Maybe apps is in fact where it's at as far as online dating. I mean everyone is so glued to their phones now... It at least appears meeting someone away from online seems impossible. Even in bars! If I had a choice between 2 women- one was on her phone and one was not... I would go over to the one not on her phone. She is at least giving the impression she wants someone to talk to.

But then this brings up age. I want to play with women around my age. In years past I myself have made posts in the personal section. No responses. Only from Men. And being in a relationship I just tripled the odds against us. We have met women in bars... And they have always turned out a bit crazy.

But with people I have been in love with... I took chances just going to different places. Different bars, conventions, movies, events. And been open to the possibilities. But there are limits when a conversation must end because either it was something the person said, uncouth or just not for me, or I'm just not attracted. So maybe It's to be said if you try a little of everything, online, offline, fetish, regular events that include your interests (say movies for instance) then you are bound to find someone. But confidence must be built up in yourself first. And if you don't have that... Get all the advice you can, watch tutorials etc. But... You have want to achieve that confidence. And strive towards it everyday till you meet that goal. I struggle with it too because of years and years of bullying. But when we go out... I wear something sexy, make eye contact, smile, and if anything happens great... If it doesn't... Well I'm still working on that part. I get disappointed easily once something good starts cookin'. Say in one instance a couple months of constant, hardcore flirting. But after a day or two I pick myself back up. Cause that's all I can do. Keep moving forward no matter what.

 

[robmic]

Ya know, actually I guess that is true for me too. I came here because I love tickling. To meet a gal that loves to be tickled would be awesome, but I didn't really join for that. Realistically, I would love to meet a gal that wanted to come over and go kayaking or take a walk around the lake or go to dinner before I would want to start talking about being tickled. Making a friend would be awesome! And face to face time would be the greatest!
But I'm here to get my tickling fix... from here! If I meet a nice lady, then that would be great! But I'm not going to hold my breath...

 

[EmbraceSerenity]

I am not here to meet anyone but I will say those that I have met from here have been mostly negative experiences. Not that they were horrid, but these guys would either charm you one way and then in reality show you that they only wanted their fix, or if a relationship forms, pretty much disregard your feelings. Like with any relationship you start, online or off, trust needs to be built and however well you seem to get on on the computer or through text, it is not always translated well in reality as you learn more and more about how they are. If you find it hard to make meaningful conversation online chances are a girl won't consider meeting you in real life if its too awkward. Actually get to know someone personally, ask a girl about herself and show you care, and build a good friendship first instead of just asking to roleplay.

 

[Wolf]

Ya know, actually I guess that is true for me too. I came here because I love tickling. To meet a gal that loves to be tickled would be awesome, but I didn't really join for that. Realistically, I would love to meet a gal that wanted to come over and go kayaking or take a walk around the lake or go to dinner before I would want to start talking about being tickled. Making a friend would be awesome! And face to face time would be the greatest!
But I'm here to get my tickling fix... from here! If I meet a nice lady, then that would be great! But I'm not going to hold my breath...

You've just hit upon the solution; look outside the TMF for women who are compatible, and there's a good chance you'll find one who enjoys/likes/loves/really loves tickling. They're out there, and in much greater numbers than the forum represents.

 

[kingofkaboom]

This is a very intriguing piece. I must be doing something wrong but can't quite figure it out lol. I didn't join this site to find a relationship (although that would be nice) my main intention was to find some tickling fun. I've posted maybe two or three threads in the personals section and didn't receive a single response. I gave a brief introduction, stated exactly what I was looking for, and even said that I can host or travel about an hour and half, which I think is pretty reasonable. I don't ever remember directly PMing anybody and I've had maybe two girls reach out to me but nothing ever came of it. So I'm failing miserably and I still cant find anyone near me who'd be remotely interested. I was able to tickle one girl I met from FetLife one time and that was the end of that. On the vanilla side, I was dating a girl for a short period of time over the summer but we had to cut it short because she went away for school and didn't want to do a long distance relationship. I'm optimistic that we can resume once she comes back, but the thought of introducing her to the whole tickling thing makes my skin crawl. This girl is perfect in every way and as crazy as it sounds; I'd be willing to sacrifice my attraction to feet and tickling just to have a future with her. She's that special. I'm probably wrong but the way I see it, I can't have both. I'm not a risk taker lol. But having that connection with someone is much more important to me than tickling.

But yeah I haven't been successful on here at finding ANYTHING. I'm smart, honest, caring, respectful, good looking (don't know for sure that's just what some girls have told me), I work three jobs, go to school, what else do I need to say? Knowing how to approach women on here would be so helpful not just to me, but I'm sure it would help many other guys like me as well.

 

[DisBadBo1]

It's actually quite simple. There appears to be far too much analysis into this age old question. This dynamic you describe is just an extension of the bar/nightclub scene that is well documented and the answer is really very obvious albeit not the answer that many want to hear. Research shows that something like 85% of women find only 10% of men attractive. In a sexual setting obviously attraction plays a significant if not the only role for first communication and/or future endeavors.

Equating those statistics to this community is not difficult and they probably parallel quite nicely. Note: Those statistics apply to first encounters and not people who have previously known another member.

I would assume that there is a perception among the female members of "men on the internet in a sex related community" coupled with what is a well documented innate attraction meter that finds a significantly low percentage of the male population to be attractive and men have themselves a near impossible prospect of actually meeting up with someone from here unless at a gathering.

 

[Wolf]

It's actually quite simple. There appears to be far too much analysis into this age old question. This dynamic you describe is just an extension of the bar/nightclub scene that is well documented and the answer is really very obvious albeit not the answer that many want to hear. Research shows that something like 85% of women find only 10% of men attractive. In a sexual setting obviously attraction plays a significant if not the only role for first communication and/or future endeavors.

Equating those statistics to this community is not difficult and they probably parallel quite nicely. Note: Those statistics apply to first encounters and not people who have previously known another member.

I would assume that there is a perception among the female members of "men on the internet in a sex related community" coupled with what is a well documented innate attraction meter that finds a significantly low percentage of the male population to be attractive and men have themselves a near impossible prospect of actually meeting up with someone from here unless at a gathering.

Intelligent people will always keep trying to find formulas and hard data that will help them succeed (or at least, excuse their lack of success) in an environment that has far too many variables.