Talking with a Therapist

[ChicagoDavid]

I have Aspergers, am asexual and have a massive tickling fetish. I think they absolutely overlap.

Why do you think that? I'm not agreeing or disagreeing, I just want to understand why you think they overlap. I mean, if you had a fear of heights and Aspergers, I'm guessing you would not believe that the causes overlap. Why do you think that's the case here?

 

[duderino84]

Right but what do you think a doctor who is providing therapy is usually trying to do? Usually it's "make patient feel better". You're really not getting too honest of a perspective. If DBT is "acceptance" therapy.... wouldn't accepting you have a fetish and venturing outward be a solution? /QUOTE]

Short answer is, you need to be very aware of the therapist and making sure s/he has a an approach that works for you. The therapist shouldn't just try to make you feel better. And yes, the approach of accepting that you have a fetish and working with that sounds right, but some may need more help than others in implementing that.

I guess. To be fair I tried small scale counseling like with a college counselor and basically it just felt like I was telling myself things I already knew, the counselor had relatively no skills and I just left thinking "I gotta find my own fucking answers" after a couple sessions every single time. I tried 4 or 5. So that's kind of why I rail against "therapy" so hard.

I just don't think therapy comes nearly as close to success as going out and pursuing what will make you happy. I mean my answers are all geographical. I think going to places that socially facilitate a better time can obscure indulging in whatever inferiority complex emerges from the fact you can't score with some snooty POF BBW fashioning herself as a model who has no interest in anybody unless they bend over backwards to appeal. That's all. And the fact that "incel" types I've seen had described people they're looking at as prospects rudimentarily similar to this profile indicates basically their logical radar was totally askew in terms of meeting someone ideal vs who you can logistically be with to be happy.

 

[MeatyBreastedDullness]

Not at all. I'm saying that these days a lot of perfectly sane people who act like assholes and can't be bothered trying to change pointedly and with a great deal of self-satisfaction blame it on being mentally ill so they can continue to get away with it.

That way people feel too guilty to tell them they're acting like assholes.

This is a general observation and not directed at anyone in particular.

I agree.

 

[ChicagoDavid]

I guess. To be fair I tried small scale counseling like with a college counselor and basically it just felt like I was telling myself things I already knew, the counselor had relatively no skills and I just left thinking "I gotta find my own fucking answers" after a couple sessions every single time. I tried 4 or 5. So that's kind of why I rail against "therapy" so hard.

I just don't think therapy comes nearly as close to success as going out and pursuing what will make you happy. I mean my answers are all geographical. I think going to places that socially facilitate a better time can obscure indulging in whatever inferiority complex emerges from the fact you can't score with some snooty POF BBW fashioning herself as a model who has no interest in anybody unless they bend over backwards to appeal. That's all. And the fact that "incel" types I've seen had described people they're looking at as prospects rudimentarily similar to this profile indicates basically their logical radar was totally askew in terms of meeting someone ideal vs who you can logistically be with to be happy.

Colleges often have awful counselors. They brag about the resources they have for physical disabilities but they shirk assistance for mental disabilities. Of course, one need not have a "disability" to benefit from a good counsellor. On the contrary, some issues but no disability can make it easier for the person to appropriately process the ideas and implement. Going out there with conscious thought is the best primary, but don't give up on the idea of finding a good counsellor to assist if things are bumpy. Psychiatrists rarely are good counselors, as their primary training is from medical school, and they are expensive.

 

[turtleboy]

Speaking of Asperger. Some of my friends (all of them from English-speaking countries, interestingly enough) often surmise that I could have had some mild version of autism. They cite pêle-mêle my nerdiness, my very good memory, my perceived eccentricity, my tendency to keep a clean and tidy environment around myself, my fetishes, my habit to organize and file my possessions, and sometimes even my hobbies and political views Which to me is hilarious, given my passion for discussion, my extrovert personality, and my epic inability to do even simple mental calculations.

I wonder sometimes if, in the general public (and I do mean, outside of the professional sphere of mental healthcare), "Asperger" or whatever aren't words people use to label whomever they think deviates from a given perceived "norm". If my parents had thought like that, I think my childhood would have been much less happy.

Exactly...none of the characteristics your friends referred to are even characteristic of Asperger syndrome, they're just characteristics of certain people in general. Tidiness, memory, eccentricity etc are not autistic traits, it's just the way that popular culture has come to perceive it.

People with narrow or specific interests may have quite specific fetishes also, but then lots of people have very narrow interests and lots of people have fetishes!

 

[Wade]

I haven't been in therapy myself (at least not yet) but I did have the unusual experience of talking to a (sort-of) friend's long-term therapist and it was primarily about that friend's predilection for tickling me:

https://www.ticklingforum.com/showthread.php?271580-The-Sarah-Saga-(F-M)&p=4126397#post4126397

 

[Fired]

I have Aspergers, am asexual and have a massive tickling fetish. I think they absolutely overlap.

Same

 

[ObsessedTickles]

Two part answer for me. First, yes I've seen someone, like others for sleep issues. Turned out it's more physical, sleep apnea, etc. So that's being treated. But I've never seen anyone for my fetish nor have I wanted to, I guess I accepted a long time ago that it wasn't entirely normal for the most part and I'd deal with it, like many of us with good results and bad. Now full disclosure I am very open with non consent tickling (not kidnapping anyone obviously) but have used that situation when I was younger at parties, school, college, with family, etc, to pin down and tickle people mercilessly. I've also worked it into relationships, with mixed results.

That being said, part 2 is in high school I did have to talk to a guidance counselor at one point because two different girls complained about me tickling them too much. (nothing sexual or bondage just attacking them in the hall kinda thing). I basically told the counselor (who was female and cute) that I loved to tickle and thought it was pretty harmless. I also told her I'd tickle her if I could, which looking back was pretty stupid and I'm lucky she didn't recommend me to be expelled or for real therapy or something. All she did was look annoyed and say I'm not ticklish, then steered the conversation back to me. I told her "they all say that" or something along those lines. Yes I still fantasize about wishing I could have gotten her alone and tied down somewhere lol. And yes I was lucky, that was many years ago. These days they'd have me down as a future Batman villain or something for remarking like that.

Sorry for the ramble, not sure if that counts as talking to a therapist about it.