The entertainment industry...Things that amuse me

[naveltkltr1350]

Tee hee hee. And she's dating "Fez." 😀 😀 😀

Actually he broke up with her..good move Fez good move! -pats his head:lmao 😀

 

[Dussicar]

BTW: Thanks Nessonite.

15.I'm kind of glad that Destiny's child broke up. Now don't get me wrong, I don't HATE them. Some of their songs were catchy. It's just that I have to question the mental validity of three women who:
A) Sing about being strong, stand-up-for-yourselves independant women, while dressing like cheap whores.
B) Incorperate a slide-whistle into a song about adultery.
C) Use phrases like: "I don't think you're ready for this jelly." WHEN DESCRIBING THEIR OWN ASSES!


16.Well, it looks as though a CGI live action version of the original TRANSFORMERS is supposed to be filming soon. Growing up in the 80's, I loved this show. Nowadays all the Transformes cartoons that are on, are usually that "super happy energon force" japanimation crap. So, I was thrilled when I heard the news.
Unfortunately, I heard some disturbing things from the producer in an interview, and wondered if maybe this idea should just be let go. Though I don't want to type what I heard, I can say it wasn't good.
Honestly, why the fuck does someone take an idea like this and always seem to go out of their way to mess with it? You've all seen this happen at one point or another: A producer takes a character from a comic, book TV show etc. Put them on the big screen, and mess with everything to the point that there IS no point in making the movie in the first place.
FINE! You know what? If Transformers wants to tank, then I'll help!

AS OF NOW, I AM THE VOICE CASTING DIRECTOR!!

OPTIMUS PRIME.......LUCY LAWLESS
MEGATRON........JUDGE REINHOLD
STARSCREAM.....CHRISTOPHER WALKEN
IRONHIDE......Do you know who Sam Elliot is? GOOD. BECAUSE I'M CASTING HIS MOTHER!

There, just a taste of the bloody destruction that I fully intend to wreak!

17. I hate cheesecake. No, I know this dosent have anything to do with the industry. I just said it because I think I'm the only one on the planet who does.

 

[Dussicar]

Actually he broke up with her..good move Fez good move! 😛ats his head:lmao 😀

LINDSAY: "After my CD goes double platinum and I win my oscar for some drivelly teen movie, we'll repair to the hamptons for some pop and chips."

FEZ: "FAH-GIT' YOU, BITCH!"

 

[CellarDweller]

15.I'm kind of glad that Destiny's child broke up. Now don't get me wrong, I don't HATE them. Some of their songs were catchy. It's just that I have to question the mental validity of three women who:
A) Sing about being strong, stand-up-for-yourselves independant women, while dressing like cheap whores.
B) Incorperate a slide-whistle into a song about adultery.
C) Use phrases like: "I don't think you're ready for this jelly." WHEN DESCRIBING THEIR OWN ASSES!

Well, they didn't break up....they have a new song out now, and album soon to be released, if it isn't already.

 

[CellarDweller]

Other one-hit wonders, you should NOT get stuck in your head: 99 Red Balloons.

Rotflmao!

Nena is my favorite one hit wonder. Have the full lenght cd, and follow up flop album.

 

[Dussicar]

Well, they didn't break up....they have a new song out now, and album soon to be released, if it isn't already.

AH, CRAP!


BTW CELLARDWELLAR, I read your bio that you just posted.
It's nice to see a fellow Zombie-phile.(refering to your choice of favourite movies)

 

[lollercaust]

Nena is my favorite one hit wonder. Have the full lenght cd, and follow up flop album.

For more on the phenomenon of one-hit wonders, investigate humor columnist Dave Barry. He writes for the Miami Herald and also has several books out. A few years ago he wrote a column asking readers to name what they thought was the worst song ever, and received some hundreds of thousands of votes. His column is carried nationwide, and it seems everyone has an opinion about the worst song of all time. I won't tell you what won (there were separate categories for "Worst Lyrics" and "Worst Overall Song" among others) but if you can find his book or audiobook dealing with the results of that contest, I highly recommend it. My family listened to the audio version on a family vacation through Virginia one time and it was nonstop hilarity.

Barry tells of a man who, shortly after the survey ran in the newspaper, ran wild-eyed up to him in the supermarket, grabbed the front of his (Barry's) shirt, and screamed "You know that song about pina coladas? I hate it! HATE IT!!" That's the level of intensity we're talking about here. Any of Barry's other books are worth checking out as well, in addition to his blog.

 

[Dussicar]

18.David Hasselhoff's most NOTEABLE filmography
-KNIGHTRIDER
-BAYWATCH
-SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS: THE MOVIE.....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

 

[CellarDweller]

AH, CRAP!


BTW CELLARDWELLAR, I read your bio that you just posted.
It's nice to see a fellow Zombie-phile.(refering to your choice of favourite movies)

LOL!

Well there you go. Those two movies scared the hell out of me as a kid.

 

[Dussicar]

19.BOY BANDS: That's right. These institutionally, homogenized, androgynous, products of mass record production were all the rage throughout the 90's and carrying well on into this new millenium. How scary is is, that some how, they retain popularity even though, by all rights they should be dipped into a vat of sulphuric acid. You look at their pictures, and find yourself amazed that they all pose while carrying a sense of calm smugness. Quite comfortable in the fact that the only pussy they'll get are 12 year olds and the occasional unstable 20 year old woman-child.
Amusing still, is that every damn one of them is named Rick. Not ricky, not richie, just plain Rick. It dosen't matter how many guys are all in the band, they are all named Rick.
What truly kills me though, is that for some reason, they decide that they each need to adopt some stupid pet cause. I figure they think it will help with publicity. But, honestly, do you think that a pack of stupid teenage girls give a rats ass as to what they say? All these guys have to do is lick their own kneecap and every teen girl will scream their fool heads off.
I present you with an interview to prove my point

-INTERVIEWER:Well, guys I gotta tell you, I loved your last hit "I want him that way." But, I would like to do something for the auiance that is here with us today. I would like to prove that you guys are not just pretty faces. I think your fans would like to know how you stand on todays issues. What do you think girls?
-(stupid teenage girls)YEEEEEEEEEE!
-INTERVIEWER:Well then, we'll start with you rick.
-RICK:don't do drugs it's bad.
(STG)YEEEEEEEEEE!
-INTERVIEWER:And how about you, over there rick?
-RICK:don't do alcohol. It's bad.
(STG)YEEEEEEEEEE!
-INTERVIEWER:How about you rick? you've been pretty quiet back there.
-RICK:don't do war. It's bad.
(STG)YEEEEEEEEEE!
-INTERVIEWER:And last but not least. You, rick.
-RICK:I shit in jars and keep it.
(STG)YEEEEEEEEEEE!


20.My fantasy interview with Paris Hilton.
-INTERVIEWER:I have to say, you are pretty much a human sloth. I can't believe you can be as stupid as you are, and still manage to live all these years. Let me ask you something. Does it hurt you to use your head?
-PARIS: Only when I repeatedly smash it against a wall.

 

[Dussicar]

*WHEW*

I'm not sure, but I think I'm finished.

 

[BigNorm]

ya know, i've had the same stuff rolling in my head too, so ya mind if i do my own list?

1. If ya want a good laugh about Paris Whorilton, watch the episode of South Park with her in it, i couldn't stop laughing.

2. Why does Hollywood love blondes more than anything? personally, i love brunettes more than anything.

3. Anna Nicole Smith: Need i say more?

4. For weeks before the election, i couldn't watch TV. 50 times in a 30 minute show, canidates would sling poo at each other, pretty much saying, the other's opponent was the spawn of satan without actually saying it. I was in a grumpy mood from all the negative talk, and our kids are supposed to watch this?

5. Sitcoms: Why must we listen to the laughter in the background, must we be cued on when to laugh? are we that robotic? do the writers think they're corny jokes are that amusing? how can anyone, even the laugh machine that makes the laughter, think such incredibly corny jokes are so funny, they laugh so hard, they almost whizz their pants?

6. Probably the only 2 Sitcoms that ARE funny that i can think of now, are Seinfeld and Friends. Anyone else agree, disagree?

that's all i can think of for now.

 

[Dussicar]

That's the spirit BIGNORM. I was hoping this thread would inspire other people to come forward with their takes on the industry. But apparantly, you me and LOLLERCAUST are the only three with a chip on their shoulder about the industry. I guess everybody else likes Hollywood and everything in it 😀

 

[BigNorm]

hehe, got some more fuel for the fire...

7. Reality Shows: Are more fake than Britney Spears and Eminem combined. (not to mention so cheesy you'll puke)

8. Why remake a famous song? it's become a fad to remake songs, but butcher the meaning of it, and give it more of a beat. At total disgrace is what it is.

9. Britney Spears and Anna Nicole Smith...... EWWWWW.... Need i say more?

 

[Cbarton]

That's the spirit BIGNORM. I was hoping this thread would inspire other people to come forward with their takes on the industry. But apparantly, you me and LOLLERCAUST are the only three with a chip on their shoulder about the industry. I guess everybody else likes Hollywood and everything in it 😀

I actually gave up on "Hollywood" (except for the Hollywood Brothre of cousre) many years ago. Nothing original, sliding further and further into the sewer each season. Sheesh, just about the only thing we watch as a familiy anymore (my kids are 9 and 8) is America's Funniest Home Videos (but those are even getting raunchy now) and "Extreme Makeover Home Edition." I guess I hail back to when you COULD watch TV as a family with young kids. Those days are gone.

Why can't Hollywood realize I want my kids to see KIDS programing that is NOT a 30 minute mechadise commercial. My son even asks why the stuff I saw as a kid on Saturday mornings is better than the stuff now. Even HE gets it, Mr. Hollywood TV Programmer!!!!

New Idea: create a kid's shows that is just good, not obnoxius brats and adults with an IQ less than Dan Rather's Neilson rating! Give my kids something that they can see without me having to either hit the mute button, change the channel, or have to start teaching my kids stuff they don't need to know until they are ADULTS! LET MY KIDS BE KIDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You know it's bad when Dinsey promotes its last hand-drawn animation ("Home on the Range") and you can't take your kids to it because it's rated PG!!!! A Disney cartoon rated PG?????????? What next? Minnie Mouse replaced by Linda Lovelace???

:::stepping off the soapbox now...::::

 

[nessonite1]

just about the only thing we watch as a familiy anymore (my kids are 9 and 8) is America's Funniest Home Videos

Best show EVER!

I agree 1000% with your stance on kiddie shows. I have the only 3 year oild in the country who has NO idea what Barney and Elmo are. Apart from the movies we've bought her the only TV she watches is Animal Planet and a non commercialized PBS cartoon called Sagwa.
In fact if we're channel surfing and pass some kiddie show she says "No, I wanna watch it, I wanna watch the bad show!". Bright, colorful, loud, I don't blame her. But it aint gonna happen. 😛
LOL possibly also the only 3 year old in the country who's seen no Disney movies past the super old onces that I consider to be true WALT Disney and not this new crap they churn out now. And they wonder why their company is going kaput.

 

[BigNorm]

i agree with ness, there's truly nothing for kids to safely watch on the old tube, unless you wanna dish out money for a dish. commercial free tv is what we need!!! heck, they got commercial free radio, why not tv. you just don't understand how much i despise those viagra wanna be pills, and it's not like they're even hiding the purpose anymore. commercials are dirty, and even pg movies! heck, national treasure, even though i enjoyed it, is not something to bring little kids to, movies are really pushing the limits and their safety codes. more cursing and bloody murder in pg-13, and more killing and action in pg. soon, we'll be watching a Governator flick as a rated G.

 

[nessonite1]

Thing is, without commercials subscribing to tv would be so expensive that it would be way beyond what you or I (or anyone) could afford. I would really support a ban on advertising "adult" products, prescription medications, junk food, and fast food during programs for kids and families.

 

[HOLLYWOOD]

the hollywood brother has no prblem with ads on tv as long as they not for viagra during a episode of barney or seame street. also the hollywood brother wonders if the youth should watch less of the television and play more sports. it seems to the hollywood brother that by the kids staying indoors they socialize less than back in normal times when a child gets home from school, goes outside and plays stickball or fottball until his mama calls him home for food

 

[Dussicar]

Okay, one LAST one.

21. Have you ever heard "Don't turn out the lights" by Enrique Eglasias? It's not too bad, except at the end when he literally screeches "DON'T TURN OUT THE LIGHTS!" For some reason, when I hear this, I get the feeling that I'm supposed to duck-and -cover.

 

[lollercaust]

On the above lines, I think it's Iglesias that had a song all over the radio this past summer. The only line from it I remember is "I will be your hero," or something like it. The reason I remember this song is that it starts out with two minutes of whispering. This has to be the worst idea in the history of music. Vocals really only have two parts to them: melody and passion. Therefore, if we remove the melody by having him speak, and remove the passion by having him speak in a barely audible whisper, we will clearly arrive at the best song known to mankind!

Wait, no.

Periodic whispering doesn't bother me. Sonata Arctica's newest single "Don't Say a Word" contains one whispered line, as do a few of their other songs. What bothers me is when whispering becomes a substitute for actual content. The same could be said about profanity, in fact. I'm a pretty big heavy metal fan, and I don't have a problem with Dream Theater or Iced Earth dropping an F-bomb here and there for emphasis. What I do mind is in the case of mainstream hip-hop and bands such as Tenacious D, when swear words become "We're not smart enough to write real lyrics, so we'll fill out every line with a few swears in order to keep the meter." When cussing becomes a crutch that takes the place of the song having a legitimate point, we officially have a porblem. (Yes, porblem.)

 

[Dussicar]

I'm gonna drag this stupid thread out of the mothballs for a sec.

22. It's pretty easy to know whether you're talking to a starwars fanboy. While discussing religeon, he'll refer to the book of enoch as part of the "extended universe."

23. Bjork is living proof that having less talent than a disco-tech co-ordinator, and pointless lyrics that have nothing to do with anything, can truly win you a fan base with the "artsy crowd."
I don't TRULY hate her. I'm just afraid for her is all. It's only a matter of time before she out-weirds herself, and ends up interpitive-dancing her way in front of a moving vehicle.

 

[jerrold00231]

I am a fan on Starwars too.

I am a fan on Starwars too.
These are my favorate picture from Starwars.

 

[Hungarian21]

Whoopie, join the force, kiddies! XD

That last pic in black&white is cool....looks like George wants his chair back, but Han aint buyin'! 😛

 

[Dussicar]

WOW! Here's a thread I completely forgot about. How on earth did you guys even find it?

I like the Mellenium Falcon pic, jerrold0023. I'm going to see if I can use it as a desktop background.