This thread could become ugly. Can we try to be adults and be civil?

[Ticklemmmeeeeeee]

NJJen...this is such a good thread....thank u, if u hadn't started it I was thinking of starting one similar....there were so many valid points raised with the thread about my closing my groups but I just didn't have time to even organize them all to create a new one.....I have always loved hearing feedback from others because u learn so much about yourself through the way other people see u....and u learn so much about other people based on how objectively u can view yourself in response to their feedback.....I know that I made several points in my past posts that I wanted to elaborate on but didn't.....I have been so highly judgemental of myself as of late and have been in conflict so I fear I may have even portrayed my viewpoints as judging others, I hope I didn't, if I did it certainly wasn't my intention.....
I think what is sad is that when people are confronted by one another on a level as intimate as the likes of this forum , with the sharing of viewpoints , and though the individual dynamics of our passions range far, the overall interest of tickling is obviously something we all have in common or we wouldn't be here.....I find humans interesting in that we all use various means by which to compare our "normalcy"....our levels of "okayness"....etc....all of which we should probably care beans about.....who is society? who is the media comprised of? who are we all to one another ? We're all just people...imperfect human beings doing the best we can with what we have.....my goal though, is not to deliver a sermon but to make a point....as a woman smack in the middle of what I have self diagnosed as an "extreme" tickling fetish I have been in great conflict as of late and it is not the members here, yahoo or anywhere else on earth I am worried about judging me....it is the only one whose judgement really matters in the end.... I care more of what Gods word says about the way I am supposed to be living my life than what anyone else may think....and I am in conflict with what I want to do and what I feel I should be doing.....and the mixed messages any number of people have received from me are very real...I will validate that...I send conflicting messages because I am in conflict....I have so many thoughts and fantasies about being tickled during so many periods of every one of my days that I don't know how to handle it sometimes.....and as geeky as it sounds I am crying so hard at this moment because I have nowhere to talk about it....no one to talk about it with in a way that is safe......my boyfriend, whom I love to pieces has moved away and though we still love one another like mad we cannot be together right now....heck, we may not be able to be physically together again....(okay, crying much harder now...lol...and laughing....I think women are the only creatures on earth that can laugh and cry simultaneously...*sniffle*...lol)...anyway, based on my apparent vulnerability, I am even more protective of my conversations with men...not wanting to send the "wrong message"...I have tried to confide in male friends in the past and thru no fault of their own the wrong message was sent.....Jenn...as a woman I am sure u know this all too well...when a women admits she loves sex she is labeled harshly thanks to our ancestors and theirs before them....Like so many other women on this panel and in the world, I am a very sexual woman with many "strange" interests so I am as suseptible as one can be to judgement I suppose....so NJJenn.....in defense of us...women are sent such a mixed bag of signals of what men and society deem appropriate that it gets to the point where u have to rely upon how u judge yourself and then decide who we want to hold us accountable....I would never push religion or anything else on anyone but for me, I have found that Gods word provides me with the structure and boundaries that I have needed my whole life from a loving being...I never had that at home and when u rely upon other imperfect human beings to provide a boundary for u regardless of their level of selflessness , there is always an agenda involved....to summarize... as women and men we need to decide by what standard we will judge our own behavior and self worth and be loyal to it regardless of what other people think....people will always leave, by choice or death so I choose God...but whatever works for everyone, God Bless🙂
~ticklemmmeeeeeee

 

[Ticklemmmeeeeeee]

I know what ur thinking...."Oh no! She's baaaack!!!"....lol.....just had a few after thoughts......I think it's so fascinating how every one of us will at some point in our lives, sincerely say that we do not care what others think.....I will take the unqualified liberty of interpreting what I think this really means....at least from my perspective....
we all possess elements in each one of our unique personalities that render us sensitive to what others think ...so we want to be liked and viewed upon as generally good people.....but on a larger scale we won't die if someone disagrees or judges us....we may feel a bit down and depending on whom the "blow" was delivered, our self esteem may suffer a dent here and there....but overall, we generally brush ourselves off and move on, hopefully better in some way than we were before.....whether it is because of or in spite of the "attack"....in fact it is good for us to be constructively criticized....operative word being "constructively"🙂 .........that said, we all have to always consider the source from which criticism comes......others tell us what they think for the most part because they either need us to validate the choice they have made as a good one or they want u too, to feel as they do...sometimes both....for the most part, I don't believe malice is involved...I think deep down, even the "known" offenders of mudslinging, simply want to be accepted and deemed as valid in their points of view.....the complexities that comprise us all as human beings also create the diversity that makes sharing viewpoints that much more interesting and valuable......just some thoughts from mee🙂 (actually, this post is intended on some level to divert ur attention from my earlier post because now that I have re-read it I feel a bit embarrassed, I ridiculously wrote it with the mindset that it was NJJenn only that I was talking to....and here it is, for everyone to see....grrrr to me...lol...I should have ended it with "move along men, nothing to see here"...lol...
just being silly mee🙂
byeeee🙂
~ticklemmmeeeeeee

 

[njjen3953]

ticklemmmeeeeeee,
Please e-mail me and let's talk. I will give you my phone number if you want.

Jen
[email protected]

 

[Ticklemmmeeeeeee]

Thanks jenn🙂 I did, left u mine as well🙂...~tm

 

[tickleshotel]

I agree with Ticklemeeeeee,It is natural to want to be liked as a person with our own qualities and weaknesses and everyone at some point in their lives is a "new kid on the block" and when someone is new of course they don;t want to feel left out and want to be accepted but at the same time that new person doesn;t want to present themselves to the others in a manner that others may look towards as "desperate for attention".Also as Ticklemeeee stated that we wouldn;t die just because someone disagrees ,judges us but I sincerely believe that one simply can;t please everyone at all times so we search our lives for people that we can relate to ,and enjoy that persons companionship,personality ..It is only really here at the TMF that I have found others that I can relate to even with so many different upbringing,background,personality that I know,feel I am right at home.

 

[Iggy pop]

Steve,
I was not talking necessarily about myself, but thanks for coming to my defense. As I mentioned earlier, this thread was mostly inspired by ticklemmmeeeeeee closing her yahoo groups. I know she was getting bombarded even though she clearly stated that she has a boyfriend and is not looking. I talk to women in the community and constantly hear stories about guys e-mailing and IMing them in inappropriate ways.

You guys(not all, but many) want females that are into tickling, but then you treat us like this?

I am speaking for not just myself, but women in general. Yes, I have experienced some of this as well and those who have done it to me, felt their manhood shrink up to the point I am sure their voices became several octives higher. LOL

The treatment you describe usually stems from desperation. A lot of guys are very uncomfortable with their fetish which leads to them try to latch on to any women who shares the fetish. I've seen two forms of despicable behavior here: Men who treat women like object for their lust, and men who treat women like goddeses and put them on a pedestal.

 

[Oddjob0226]

Why is it that if a female is open about liking the sexual side of tickling, she becomes labled a slut and respect for her as a person goes out the window? I have seen it over and over on the internet and especially here.

Jen

I've never seen that here. When, where did this happen? Aw, fiddle - it's like people who enjoy their tickling a little intense vs. light or someone's too old, whatever. Sometimes you gotta remember that the Puritans came over to the U.S. and killed the Indians because they couldn't get along with their neighbors back home or the new ones here. Be a slut - so what!

 

[njjen3953]

The treatment you describe usually stems from desperation. A lot of guys are very uncomfortable with their fetish which leads to them try to latch on to any women who shares the fetish. I've seen two forms of despicable behavior here: Men who treat women like object for their lust, and men who treat women like goddeses and put them on a pedestal.

Iggy,
Most people in the community that know me, know that if they are respectful towards me i will treat them with the respect they deserve. I also will agree to meet and play with anyone who conducts themselves in a respectful and appropriate manner.

On the other hand, if they treat me badly or are vile in their conversation with me, I will emasculate them so badly that they will need to sit to pee. 😉