ShiningIce
3rd Level Green Feather
- Joined
- Feb 14, 2002
- Messages
- 4,703
- Points
- 36
Well thats not fair. If u tickle someone u should expect to be tickled back.
-
If you would like to get your account Verified, read this thread -
The TMF is sponsored by Clips4sale - By supporting them, you're supporting us. -
Check out Tickling.com - the most innovative tickling site of the year. -
>>> If you cannot get into your account email me at [email protected] <<<
Don't forget to include your username
Why is it so hard to be a male ticklee???
- Thread starter markymarc
- Start date
Well thats not fair. If u tickle someone u should expect to be tickled back.
*begin rant*
"Fair"? Uh, no. There is no "fair" that includes you doin' to someone what they don't want done. Goin' that path will get you single more oft than not, regardless of the gender you chose for a partner.
If a person tells you something is off limits, it's off limits. This is something I'm finding, more and more, that I appreciate about the BDSM subcultures. They DEFINE the do's and don'ts of their relationships up front. None of this "I getta, 'cause you getta". If she says no, no means no.
If you don't believe no means no, then you missed something somewhere in the last century, 'cause that line was drawn back then. This is a new century. "No" is a negation. "Don't tickle me" is a clear statement of negation. If you seek a reciprocating relationship, where you get to tickle and be tickled, you have to ASK for such, and get permission. No one's body is subject to the concept of "fair". We're all adults here, and should know this by now.
The legalities of such behavior also subject you to legal action. If a woman believes tickling to be sexual, and doesn't want herself tickled, you're not only assaulting her with your unwanted touch, you're risking rape charges. Special things await those folks, in prison. Some folks are into that sort of penetration. If she has a good enough lawyer, you face civil charges, too. You could be broke, in prison, for your belief in what's "fair".
"Fair" is a dangerous word in this culture.
*end rant*
'Ice, I do apologize for the vehemence of this invective, but that statement makes it okay to do what you feel, rather than what's morally, ethically and legally fair. Two of those are arguable. One ain't. Find out what she'll accept and allow, and more importantly, what's off limits. If a woman is bold enough to declare limits, respect 'em, please. It's a sad thing to picture one of us arrested, detained, and violated, for what stems from misinterpretation and misunderstanding.
What's bizarre about my stance on this is that I reciprocate for my wife. She tickles me too, and, to quote Boomtown, "I'm a tickler, dammit." While I walk your walk, 'Ice, I don't talk your talk. Even assumin' you're jokin', there's too much potential for people to mistake this for permission to mistreat a lover.
That would be bad.
"Fair"? Uh, no. There is no "fair" that includes you doin' to someone what they don't want done. Goin' that path will get you single more oft than not, regardless of the gender you chose for a partner.
If a person tells you something is off limits, it's off limits. This is something I'm finding, more and more, that I appreciate about the BDSM subcultures. They DEFINE the do's and don'ts of their relationships up front. None of this "I getta, 'cause you getta". If she says no, no means no.
If you don't believe no means no, then you missed something somewhere in the last century, 'cause that line was drawn back then. This is a new century. "No" is a negation. "Don't tickle me" is a clear statement of negation. If you seek a reciprocating relationship, where you get to tickle and be tickled, you have to ASK for such, and get permission. No one's body is subject to the concept of "fair". We're all adults here, and should know this by now.
The legalities of such behavior also subject you to legal action. If a woman believes tickling to be sexual, and doesn't want herself tickled, you're not only assaulting her with your unwanted touch, you're risking rape charges. Special things await those folks, in prison. Some folks are into that sort of penetration. If she has a good enough lawyer, you face civil charges, too. You could be broke, in prison, for your belief in what's "fair".
"Fair" is a dangerous word in this culture.
*end rant*
'Ice, I do apologize for the vehemence of this invective, but that statement makes it okay to do what you feel, rather than what's morally, ethically and legally fair. Two of those are arguable. One ain't. Find out what she'll accept and allow, and more importantly, what's off limits. If a woman is bold enough to declare limits, respect 'em, please. It's a sad thing to picture one of us arrested, detained, and violated, for what stems from misinterpretation and misunderstanding.
What's bizarre about my stance on this is that I reciprocate for my wife. She tickles me too, and, to quote Boomtown, "I'm a tickler, dammit." While I walk your walk, 'Ice, I don't talk your talk. Even assumin' you're jokin', there's too much potential for people to mistake this for permission to mistreat a lover.
That would be bad.
D
Deleted member 2452
Guest
wait dvnc
there are times when i scream "that's not fair"
like the times when i'm trying to tickle my wife, and she grabs me and starts tickling my most ticklish spot. now that's just not fair!
steve
there are times when i scream "that's not fair"
like the times when i'm trying to tickle my wife, and she grabs me and starts tickling my most ticklish spot. now that's just not fair!
steve
That's why I apologized to 'Ice in the post, brother. It's a matter of special cases sometimes, and 'Ice *may* have been kiddin'. Even if 'Ice wasn't kiddin', there may have been no intent of malice.
It's the use of "fair" that's a dangerous game. Keep in mind, Steve, that you and I are old guys, relatively speaking, and that we already HAVE years of conversation online on this topic. Many here are JUST old enough to be here. Showin' someone lookin' for info a notion like "it's fair to tickle anyone that tickles me" is a bad deal. Teaches a body that it's okay to do something that's actually ILLEGAL and questionable as hell, otherwise.
What you're describin', in particular, is the exception, and it's STILL dangerous. Here's a what-if for ya - what if, when she says such, she doesn't mean it as you mean it? What if she MEANS that she doesn't find a behavior to be equitable and appropriate? How would you know? Do you not fight, now and again, as all couples seem to do? Would this not constitute the potential for one such fight, later on, after repeat occurences?
Much simpler to ESTABLISH bounds first, THEN play the "not fair" game while kidding. I do such. I know her boundaries, though. Knowin' is the important FIRST step in that, though. That you're arguin' without statin' such leaves me still concerned for what's gettin' told to thousands of potential readers.
Mind ya, if ya don't care what your partner believes is a boundary, that's different. I don't think you one to discount such feelings, Steve. I don't think you'd want someone datin' a kid of yours that DID discount such, even accidentally. That's where I'm comin' from.
It's the use of "fair" that's a dangerous game. Keep in mind, Steve, that you and I are old guys, relatively speaking, and that we already HAVE years of conversation online on this topic. Many here are JUST old enough to be here. Showin' someone lookin' for info a notion like "it's fair to tickle anyone that tickles me" is a bad deal. Teaches a body that it's okay to do something that's actually ILLEGAL and questionable as hell, otherwise.
What you're describin', in particular, is the exception, and it's STILL dangerous. Here's a what-if for ya - what if, when she says such, she doesn't mean it as you mean it? What if she MEANS that she doesn't find a behavior to be equitable and appropriate? How would you know? Do you not fight, now and again, as all couples seem to do? Would this not constitute the potential for one such fight, later on, after repeat occurences?
Much simpler to ESTABLISH bounds first, THEN play the "not fair" game while kidding. I do such. I know her boundaries, though. Knowin' is the important FIRST step in that, though. That you're arguin' without statin' such leaves me still concerned for what's gettin' told to thousands of potential readers.
Mind ya, if ya don't care what your partner believes is a boundary, that's different. I don't think you one to discount such feelings, Steve. I don't think you'd want someone datin' a kid of yours that DID discount such, even accidentally. That's where I'm comin' from.
Oh, well why didn't ya say so... 😉
Yeah, wit' friends, it's definitely a different deal. Friends reciprocate rather evenly, and a friend won't do what they can't take. Rarely see friends negotiate such, 'cept for the kinked, like at play parties, gatherings and such. Those are definitely examples of exceptional friends, though.
Definitely different wit' friends than wit' lovers. Thanks for the clarification, 'Ice. I appreciate it!
Yeah, wit' friends, it's definitely a different deal. Friends reciprocate rather evenly, and a friend won't do what they can't take. Rarely see friends negotiate such, 'cept for the kinked, like at play parties, gatherings and such. Those are definitely examples of exceptional friends, though.
Definitely different wit' friends than wit' lovers. Thanks for the clarification, 'Ice. I appreciate it!
D
Deleted member 2452
Guest
i was trying to make a funny
i happen to agree with what you said dvnc. i just felt like throwing in a funny, to lighten things up. it being just the opposite of the ice situation.
steve
i happen to agree with what you said dvnc. i just felt like throwing in a funny, to lighten things up. it being just the opposite of the ice situation.
steve
mistermaster
Registered User
- Joined
- Dec 13, 2002
- Messages
- 2
- Points
- 0
Cast your net a little wider?
If you're only looking to have a woman tickle you -- i.e, if that's all that gets you off -- then that's your scene and that's what you need. But if you would consider having a man tickle you, then you double your chances of getting your needs filled.
Just a suggestion from another Chicagoan who happens to be 'ler...
If you're only looking to have a woman tickle you -- i.e, if that's all that gets you off -- then that's your scene and that's what you need. But if you would consider having a man tickle you, then you double your chances of getting your needs filled.
Just a suggestion from another Chicagoan who happens to be 'ler...
MistressValerie
TMF Expert
- Joined
- Oct 12, 2002
- Messages
- 343
- Points
- 0
Thank you 🙂 🙂 🙂 I would love to have you on my bed, on your back, no shirt, tied to the bedposts with four silk scarves ... and I would put on a Shakira song, and start to playleeboy said:
Love and laughter,
Oddjob0226
4th Level Indigo Feather
- Joined
- Apr 22, 2001
- Messages
- 6,870
- Points
- 0
Boston, schmoston. There are no female 'lers OR'lees in Dallas! And if you aren't successful or cute, forget it, kid.
Actually, I think if you let a woman tickle you, she'd like it and become a 'ler with much entheusiasm. I created a monster out of a good Catholic girl in college. Part of it is fun, part of it is sexiness, and part of it is the power play- having that kind of power over a (successful) guy, especially when it's contained in that psychologically odd wrapping of real playfulness and real cruelty. Just don't go all fetish-y on her, Gunga Sin, not at first, unless you know she's into it, too.
But, really, so many people out there can't find the right partner, male or female, in the "regular" world... We're just in the same boat in a smaller world.
Actually, I think if you let a woman tickle you, she'd like it and become a 'ler with much entheusiasm. I created a monster out of a good Catholic girl in college. Part of it is fun, part of it is sexiness, and part of it is the power play- having that kind of power over a (successful) guy, especially when it's contained in that psychologically odd wrapping of real playfulness and real cruelty. Just don't go all fetish-y on her, Gunga Sin, not at first, unless you know she's into it, too.
But, really, so many people out there can't find the right partner, male or female, in the "regular" world... We're just in the same boat in a smaller world.
