It kills any kind of relationship

[maniactickler]

Do any of you people actually attempt relationships and have the fetish ruin it? Or just assume it'll mess everything up?

The first step is to find a woman that's ticklish and ok with it, that your attracted to, and is attracted to you. that's basically a needle in a haystack.

 

[BarbaricTickler88]

Wise Words! I believe OKdremur has hit the nail on the head, listen to his advice!

I too would be hitting the like button his his comment.

He has very simplistic view on this whole situation. That "if she loves you, she'll do it" philosophy of his is neither accurate nor is it fair to the woman you are with. Some people just can't stand to be tickled, or don't like tickling entirely. No amount of love and understanding is going to change that EVER.
There are multiple levels of a successful relationship. Sexuality is as equally important as the rest of them. If you are not asexual and you can't satisfy your sexual urges with the person you love, then that relationship is doomed to failure, a slow death. This and any other fetish for that matter can certainly be and most likely will be a stumbling block to almost any relationship. just as maniatickler said, finding a compatible partner in this situation is basically like finding a needle in a haystack.

 

[Wolf]

He has very simplistic view on this whole situation. That "if she loves you, she'll do it" philosophy of his is neither accurate nor is it fair to the woman you are with. Some people just can't stand to be tickled, or don't like tickling entirely. No amount of love and understanding is going to change that EVER.
There are multiple levels of a successful relationship. Sexuality is as equally important as the rest of them. If you are not asexual and you can't satisfy your sexual urges with the person you love, then that relationship is doomed to failure, a slow death. This and any other fetish for that matter can certainly be and most likely will be a stumbling block to almost any relationship. just as maniatickler said, finding a compatible partner in this situation is basically like finding a needle in a haystack.

Well, then, by all means, keep doing what's not working for you.

 

[Ticklerguy4u]

I think its a double edge sword. If you meet a person that is into your fetish then you must find out if you have common lives and morals outside the fetish. If you meet someone outside the fetish you get along with...then you have to find out if you can live and experience the fetish together. Either way...its probably easier to seek out like minded ticklephiles first since the other things can be adjusted like every relationship (and often are...fetish or no fetish)...IMO

 

[chicago]

Nothing offensive of course. I'm just saying that we can't all expect to end up with beautiful women who will somehow magically grow to like our fetish. Chances of that are slim to none. I for one would be happy with a cute girl next door who will understand and accept me the way I am. Just like the last girl I was with. And she was the definition of "vanilla". But she was cute and she didn't mind my obsessions. It took me three years to tell her though. lol

I dunno what my face has to do with other peoples expectations but OK...

I agree that forming a relationship before being open about tickling is setting one up for failure. The longer the relationship, the stronger the feelings, the more pressure there is around having the conversation so people either avoid it, or end up bringing it up nervously because it now feels like a big secret that was kept from ones SO for so long. And god forbid if they hate it, now you've gone and worked for years towards falling in love with someone that hates what youre into. Why anyone would choose that over being honest from the jump, I do not understand.

 

[Wolf]

I dunno what my face has to do with other peoples expectations but OK...

I agree that forming a relationship before being open about tickling is setting one up for failure. The longer the relationship, the stronger the feelings, the more pressure there is around having the conversation so people either avoid it, or end up bringing it up nervously because it now feels like a big secret that was kept from ones SO for so long. And god forbid if they hate it, now you've gone and worked for years towards falling in love with someone that hates what youre into. Why anyone would choose that over being honest from the jump, I do not understand.

Every time you don't tell a partner about what you really want, you're not only denying yourself, you're denying them the opportunity to make you happy. I'd think everyone in a loving relationship would want that chance.

 

[porcelaindoll2]

I dunno what my face has to do with other peoples expectations but OK...

I agree that forming a relationship before being open about tickling is setting one up for failure. The longer the relationship, the stronger the feelings, the more pressure there is around having the conversation so people either avoid it, or end up bringing it up nervously because it now feels like a big secret that was kept from ones SO for so long. And god forbid if they hate it, now you've gone and worked for years towards falling in love with someone that hates what youre into. Why anyone would choose that over being honest from the jump, I do not understand.

I agree with you on this one hundred percent. Man if we all could get $100 every time someone posts a thread about how they've been dating someone for awhile and are now scared/nervous on how to bring up the topic of tickling. I personally think by at least the third or fourth date it should be brought up. Then again I never had the dreaded feeling of oh my god how do I mention this because everyone I dated knew from the start what I was into plus I knew what they were into.

 

[S1]

Thank you for sharing that chicago. I kind of assumed everything was just easy for you, being a beautiful woman. Knowing that someone like you has to deal with the same fears and insecurities as the rest of us is somehow comforting.

Dude3, I go about it in a different way. As okdremur said, the relationship has to come first. But when I become involved with a lady, I just tend to act upon my desires, when appropriate and let her be the one to talk about it. For instance, if we're making out, I'll do a little playful, flirty tickling and see how she reacts. Most girls seem to enjoy it if they like you. And well, if she hates it or isn't into you, she's not someone to pursue. Same thing with the foot aspect. When we're fooling around, I'll give a little toe suck. Usually they like it or at least aren't negative about it, but if she says something like "I hate having my feet touched" or "feet are nasty", probably not a good match for a foot guy.
And most women are very perceptive. They're going to take note of the fact that you tickle more than any guy they've been with or that you're more into their feet. I find it's easier to let them bring it up. Just don't look away and be all sheepish about it when they do. You've got to own it.

At the end of the day, it's just an extra criteria for compatibility. Don't give up, just change your game plan a little. The right woman is out there. You just have to find her.

This is the best advice right here. Judge her reactions by incorporating a tickle here and there early on, and, when things get more intimate, give her a foot rub and a little kiss on her feet. Go off her cues. As long as she isn't grossed out by feet or had some horrible experience with tickling when growing up that makes her adamant about not being tickled, then continue to incorporate it more in your intimacy. Don't ever make it only about the fetish though, make sure you are responsive to her needs.

This is advice that I wish I learned earlier on. In my first couple of relationships I felt I had to talk about having a fetish early in and likely acted very ashamed of it. In retrospect it is obvious to me why those girls pulled away. The above is a low risk way to help you find a great relationship. Good luck bud, this will get easier.

 

[chicago]

I find being assertive, direct, and honest - having a frank discussion like an adult, is way better than playing games with hints and clues. You can never be sure until you say it out loud.

 

[Ticklerguy4u]

I find being assertive, direct, and honest - having a frank discussion like an adult, is way better than playing games with hints and clues. You can never be sure until you say it out loud.

Yeah, but then you run the risk of them not liking it or only doing it out of affection which I guess is okay but I still think seeking a kinky partner is easier. I usually bring up "are you into anything kinky?" as I am getting to know someone I want to date. I figure if they are creeped out by it then I know that we won't mesh well sexually. Some have said no at first because of embarrassment but I usually assure them, my question is a positive thing not negative.

 

[chicago]

Well them not liking it is,what you want to find out before feelings are involved, I imagine, but the "Are you kinky" approach sounds good imo

 

[Ticklerguy4u]

Well them not liking it is,what you want to find out before feelings are involved, I imagine, but the "Are you kinky" approach sounds good imo

Well I figure a woman who isn't put off by it...isn't frightened by her own sexuality. I dealt with it before...never again.

 

[Wolf]

Well I figure a woman who isn't put off by it...isn't frightened by her own sexuality. I dealt with it before...never again.

Depends on when you bring it up. If you're asking that in the first five minutes, she might be plenty kinky...and just considers it none of your business.

 

[chicago]

Well yeah, not the first five minutes, maybe the first five dates tho

 

[Wolf]

Well yeah, not the first five minutes, maybe the first five dates tho

Oh, definitely. If you haven't gotten into some juicy details by date 3....what the hell are you talking about?

 

[Ticklerguy4u]

Depends on when you bring it up. If you're asking that in the first five minutes, she might be plenty kinky...and just considers it none of your business.

Very true. Only a fool asks such private things in the first five minutes.

 

[Ticklerguy4u]

I agree with you on this one hundred percent. Man if we all could get $100 every time someone posts a thread about how they've been dating someone for awhile and are now scared/nervous on how to bring up the topic of tickling. I personally think by at least the third or fourth date it should be brought up. Then again I never had the dreaded feeling of oh my god how do I mention this because everyone I dated knew from the start what I was into plus I knew what they were into.

I only did that once as I said never again. Most of the time if I date someone they tend to know all about me. It may not come out all at once but if we are going to get intimate then there shouldn't be a cause for embarrassment. I mean if she is going to be a girlfriend

I must consider her a friend that is a girl.

 

[tickletherapist]

You are welcome to use our concept of tickle therapy. I believe that, in time, this would be more and more obvious and well-known that tickling is great and healthy for mind and body alike.
This is what we really do here, raising awareness and practicing it.
Tickling isn't a dark thing, it's a thrilling game, where you choose the rules. Which is fun to play especially with your SO. Because it's also sexual in the most positive way. It's like doing massage to each other.

Bearing that in mind, understanding it, believe me, you are capable to bring anyone you like into it.
Those who understand will understand what I'm talking about.
So good luck to everyone and best wishes!

P.S. We are currently working on the development of the separate website about tickle therapy, with all the information collected about all the positive things about it.
If we only could get this domain name tickletherapy.com from that smart ass who keeps it for nothing like a dog in the mangler
I hope we'll get this project finished and one time you'll just have to give the link to anyone you want to explain about what you find in tickling. In a way that doesn't look like a porn website in black and red, but makes you curious to try it and find out more. It's up to you by which rules you'll be playing this game then.