Anyone want to develop a nice little arachnophobia?

[Marauder]

I just had my face shoved into a world of horror on another forum I visit regularily. I think I'll share this particular reason to crawl under the bedsheets and weep silently and NEVER EVER leave the room again with all of you, because I'm such a bastard.

The following links depict the BIGGEST FUCKING SPIDER I've ever had to behold. If you suffer from arachnophobia, you really shouldn't open them. This is not a joke - I thought I was over my mortal fear of spiders, and I can't look at those pictures without screaming and minimizing the browser window. My scalp is still crawling from just sort of glancing at the screen from behind hooded eyes. I repeat, this is not a joke. The pictures don't depict anything funny, they just show ONE FUCKING HUGE SPIDER that will give you nightmares if you don't like arachnoids.

They should be great for various pranks, though - try installing one of those pictures as the desktop wallpaper of a hated co-worker, for example. The screams should be worth the mental agony caused by having to look at the picture yourself.

So without further ado:

THE GIANT CLOCK SPIDER

Real name: Australian Hunstman Spider. Not very poisonous, but can probably bite your hand clean off.

Close up and personal for that extra bit of AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

 

[amk714]

Yikes! Glad I don't live in Australia. I'd better watch out for that clock spider, though! 😱

 

[Limeoutsider]

Jesus Christ. Yea, that about sums it up. COuldnt really see the clock spider

 

[Limeoutsider]

on a side note, I remember when Moses posted a pic of a camel spider. That still creeps me out. Im never ever going to Australia. Ever.

 

[MrMacphisto]

um....

Y'all do realize that the "clock" spider is the same spider as the Huntsman one... it's a sequence of pics showing someone removing the clock to reveal the spider.... lol The clock pic is to give a sense of scale to the size of the spider....

 

[Limeoutsider]

Yes we do. Thanks for your concern!

 

[ShiningIce]

KILL IT KILL IT KILL IT KILL IT!!!!!!!

 

[4Pawz]

good freaking gawd!!! I was already afraid of spiders, now every damned hair on my body is standing on end *shudders and shivers repeatedly*

ick ick ick ick ew ew ew ew

Pawz

PS-I am sleeping with a bat and bug spray tonight!

 

[SmileyTkls]

Sooo... What's different than any other nights, Pawz? 😀


Smiley

 

[Mimi]

Oh he is SO FREAKING COOL!!!!!!! OMG!

Granted I would still keep my distance from such an insect, but I do have a huge amount of respect for spiders, and truly admire them. They are magnificent creatures!

Mimi

 

[Oblesklk]

Wow, looks like the ocean lost one of its denizens of the deep...better put it back.

 

[Dave2112]

As a person with severe arachnophobia (and a deathly allergy to spider venom), I'd just like to thank Marauder for posting that...while I charge up the lightsaber for a trip to Germany, old friend...

Seriously, that thing doesn't creep me out as much as the South American Bird Spider. Maybe it's because the Huntsman is mostly legs, while the Bird Spider has a slightly smaller "legspan", but weighs more than my cat. I've seen footage of those things capturing and overpowering large birds and rodents that were fighting back ferociously, and I'm still glad that spiders are as small as they are.

They say that your biggest fear can be your greatest fascination, and I find this true with spiders. I do admire them (from a distance or behind glass), as they are natures perfect killers. It has been said that with thier strength, speed and design they could very well be the dominant species on the planet if they were even the size of dogs.

 

[The Pianist]

Don't Panic

Seriously people... I live in Australia and thats the least of your worries. Yeah, the huntsman might be big... and it WILL, Gaurenteed, turn up on a wall of your house at least once every six months... but seriously, all you do is find a bowl or jar... put it over the dumb critter... slide a piece of paper or card underneath it... and then turf it out into your garden... knowing full well the absolute worst it can do is crawl over you.... and maybe bite you if make it.... that and turn up on your wall next year.

If you really want to be encouraged to come to Australia...

Red Back Spider, very small... very dangerous.
Funnel Web Spider, very small... very dangerous.
Wolf Spider... same as above...
Trapdoor....
White Tail...
Actually, a heck of alot of Australian are at the least poisionous... if not deadly.

Then theres the snakes (Tipan, Tiger, Coppertail....) Crocs... Sydeny... John Howard.... the list goes on.


By the way... you CAN kill the infamous clock spider... but it makes a hell of a mess over the wall.

 

[Eric Von Zipper]

Oh big deal, i found one of those boys in my cheerios last week; ya just eat around it. Pawzy, don't be SUCH a girl.

 

[Marauder]

The Huntsman Spider: It's australian for "AYYY!!!"

I'm not ever going to Australia. I can picture it in my head - "AUGH GIANT SPIDER RUN AWAY!!! *pantpant* Phew just made it out AAAARGH TITANIC CRITTER EATING MY SHOE RUN AWAY!!! *pantpantpant* Is there no respite - oh, another spider, but a small one, I think I can deal with that *chomp* ow. It bit me. Ack. *dies*"

 

[Dave2112]

I've never understood any of my ex's desires to visit Australia. You will never catch me setting foot on that continent. Hey, if you live there, more power to ya! It just seems that there are about 50,000,000 things that want to eat/poison/mutilate/sicken/digest/mutate/paralyze/anallyfuck/chew you that it's not worth it. It's like the whole friggin' island wants to eat everything that lands on it. If the spiders, snakes, bugs or plants don't poison you, the crocodiles, lizards or birds want to eat you and in the water there's the sharks, jellyfish and venomous urchins.

What the fuck is wrong with this place?

 

[JoBelle]

Ok,
First let me say this.
What the HELL are you thinking posting that here when you KNOPW for a God backed fact that people like me are gonna have to look??!?!??!?!

Secondly,
Just put a jar over it? HUH???😕
Honey, there aren't enough jars in the world to choose from to get me close to something like that. Just a little jar and a sheet of paper my ASS! Try a flamethrower!

I was a snack for a spider once. It was teeny tiny and yet I lost a good hunk of flesh thanks to it. One that big?? I might as well lay down and put some garnish around myself on a big silver platter!

Spiders...just wrong. Wrong Wrong Wrong.

Jo

 

[Haltickling]

I love Australia, although I'm not very fond of insects and spiders either. Luckily, all I ever ran across was a bunch of rather harmless river crocodiles (not the more dangerous salt water variety). I think the risks to die from a poisonous animal in Australia is considerably lower than getting run over by a car in one of the big cities - anywhere in the world! Compare the statistics!

Anyway, that big spider gives me the creeps, too! Go away, beast!

 

[Moses25]

Get 'em off me!!

Mmmmm...they look delicious.😉

You see, in my mind's eye, I think I've watched enough nature shows to be relaxed in such an encounter. I'm as equally sure that in a real situation my sphincter would forget all aboot the memo I sent it and go poopie in my pants.

Did I just say poopie...?

...a sheet of paper my ASS! Try a flamethrower!
Spiders...just wrong. Wrong Wrong Wrong.
Jo

... ... ... ...

Thou art definitely a belle.

Cheers.😀

 

[Limeoutsider]

What the fuck is wrong with this place?

Wasnt Australia originally a place for Britians convicts?

 

[Limeoutsider]

Ok,
First let me say this.
What the HELL are you thinking posting that here when you KNOPW for a God backed fact that people like me are gonna have to look??!?!??!?!

Marauder warned us 😉 I still looked though

 

[TicklingDuo]

So tell me. Do they sell those cute little lads as house pets? My cat might enjoy playing with one of them. I actually prefer the larger bugs to the smaller ones...easier to hit when you start throowing things at them!

Ann

 

[His Divine Shadow]

A bigger thing to worry about in Austraila is the Funnel Web Spider. It'll kill ya right quick.

 

[Marauder]

A bigger thing to worry about in Austraila is the Funnel Web Spider. It'll kill ya right quick.

So will a speeding car. Seeing a car doesn't send me scrambling up a tree screaming like a little girl, though.

 

[4Pawz]

I am well known for not being easy to scare. One of the few things that can send me screaming from a room is a nasty creepy crawly hairy bugger like that!! *swings her bat at the spiders* bad bad bad bad!!!

Pawz