Tasha no-showed for a session

[chicago]

I don't think you did address the issue of intent really. You made the point that people can still be offended but as I said, people can be offended regardless. If offense isn't intended and someone is still offended, that doesn't automatically make it wrong. An elderly person may be offended by the sight of a gay couple holding hands or kissing in public. That doesn't mean it is an offensive act.

As for men defending his use of the term, I don't actually see it as a male vs female issue. I would argue the same point if the situation was reversed (i.e. 'my boys'). I just think people are too quick to read offensiveness into every little thing, and to politicise comments which may have no other context.



If there were an untapped market of (paying) female customers then that would only be a good thing for producers since it would open up many more potential sales - I just don't see any evidence that there is. I don't deny that plenty of women watch and enjoy porn, but I don't see them paying for it in anything like the same numbers that men do. Commercial porn exists in it's many forms due to market forces. If people like something and are willing to pay for it then sooner or later it will get made. An enthusiast will produce the content they want to see and the audience will start to buy it, making it a viable business. Arguably, there are less gay men (and probably less gay tickling fans) than there are women, and yet gay men account for the majority of the M/M tickling audience - hence there are several gay tickling sites and stores. It succeeds even though the majority of straight men probably have no interest in it. However, I don't know of any M/M, F/M, M/F, or F/F sites that are run by female producers specifically for a female market.

The direction of porn is dictated by economics and viewing stats, not by some chauvinistic strangle-hold that the men have over the industry. There is literally nothing to stop any female (such as yourself or others on this forum) from producing their own videos, targeted at female tickling fans. You have access to all the same resources that a male producer has on starting out.

I think I did address intent, as you paraphrased what I said. And furthermore, just because someone is offended doesn't mean the offender has to give a shit. I'm just a name on a screen like anyone else. I figured someone trying to make money in the world would choose how they express themselves publicly (or in terms of this forum anyway) in a careful manner. If they don't want to, that's fine too, but I might still comment.

I don't think there are less male gay tickle fans than there are female tickle fans as proven by your point mentioning sales as well as multiple sites and stores that appeal to them. Even a pretty well-known documentary called Tickled.... ABOUT MEN. I think most don't post here due to TMF's reputation of flaming m/m fans in the past despite trying to tout themselves as the "Flame-Free Forum" for a time.

I don't know where you would determine that I have the same resources as some hypothetical person you made up for that weird point. Either way, even the female producers again appeal to ... MEN! xD

The side panel...all tits and toes. I don't even think there has ever been an F/M pic of the week in my entire membership. I could be wrong because I'm sure I haven't seen every single one, but these are just a few examples of the boring, same-old same-old, not necessarily chauvinistic, but pretty exclusively geared to straight male lers.

I'll let another dude mansplain to me how I'm wrong tho.

 

[The Tickle Room]

Ok somehow this became about me? But that's fine. Now if me saying "my girls" is the part that makes me a dick....then I guess label me as a dick. Its your right to label me whatever you want. Look I get that me saying that may offend some people but I meant it in 0 offense. My models are friends of mine and not my subs or underlings or whatever people are labeling them as in their own minds. I say guys and gals in all my lives, to stop the understanding that most people say "hey guys". I call them my girls just as I call my male models and friends my "guys". So no. There is no intent of me owning or being superior to my models and none of you know me on that level save for very few people because I bend my entire back for my models. I, however don't call them models because some of them are not that, they are people coming from all backgrounds and by using the term model make many hunt my friends down thinking they can harass them. So ya. I call them "my girls" because they are mostly my friends and people I care about. They are not owned by me nor inferior to me. Its my way of speaking and if that bothers you then I apologize but that is you not me. Yes I am a producer but I have been on the forum for quite some time and come on here to be a fetishist like all else. I am not here to be overly professional and sell everything. But one of the main reasons I avoid the forum as of late is a thread hijack like this. Ultimately I have experienced multiple models, fetish and amateurs alike be late, not show up, and make poor excuses timelessly so I simply stated something I do now to prevent that as best as possible. One of my biggest issues as a producer when I started was being passive and quiet about everything and it affected my life.
Sorry if I am late to the party but I don't scour every thread looking for trouble or expect to have to clarify words meant with no malicious intentions. If this is a problem then so be it, but I am not going to get into a battle over this. I thank all of those who defended me but lets not start a sexist tirade.

As per content being orientated to males only I don't agree with that at all. That market is tapped by producers who focus on that. Its exhausting for producers to go to different lengths to please all crowds hence the purpose of customs. I do have women who enjoy my content and have requested customs from me. I know there are women who watch and buy as well as its mostly women dominating the fetish market in my opinion. They kill it left and right on all angles so I do not think its a myth and I think there is a market for everyone. Its all about finding it.

Finally, as I stated above and UK did as well, taking offense to something can be completely subjective. I meant nothing bad by "my girls" but I will admit without proper context the statement as a whole can be perceived as very stand offish. So as I stated above, I have personally dealt with this and its EXTREMELY irritating and a huge waste of time. So back to the ORIGINAL purpose of the thread and heres some better advice:
This industry is hard. You are not just a customer but a fetishist. You were looking for a session and felt that heightened excitement but were let down by what felt like excuses and a lack of motivation. I will personally say that most producers and models suffer from this. There are times where I really do not wanna shoot and I have had professional fetish models text me saying they just were not in the right mindset and we move on to reschedule. It happens. Should she have been more open? absolutely. But not many are capable of that. Fetish models are still people and shit happens. My recommendation is text her kindly about how you felt and be more open about her returning for possibly another session. Maybe meet first then book the room? Hotels.com has a pay at check in option? Work that way ^_^
Hope I can help and clear everything up. Love you all and thank you for opening my eyes to something new. I know I am a producer but I am also 25. If theres one thing I know its I always can learn from others. Hope everyone has a great day/night. I am gonna go eat a shit ton of pizza and rewatch some Game of Thrones. <3

 

[chicago]

Ok somehow this became about me? But that's fine. Now if me saying "my girls" is the part that makes me a dick....then I guess label me as a dick. Its your right to label me whatever you want. Look I get that me saying that may offend some people but I meant it in 0 offense. My models are friends of mine and not my subs or underlings or whatever people are labeling them as in their own minds. I say guys and gals in all my lives, to stop the understanding that most people say "hey guys". I call them my girls just as I call my male models and friends my "guys". So no. There is no intent of me owning or being superior to my models and none of you know me on that level save for very few people because I bend my entire back for my models. I, however don't call them models because some of them are not that, they are people coming from all backgrounds and by using the term model make many hunt my friends down thinking they can harass them. So ya. I call them "my girls" because they are mostly my friends and people I care about. They are not owned by me nor inferior to me. Its my way of speaking and if that bothers you then I apologize but that is you not me. Yes I am a producer but I have been on the forum for quite some time and come on here to be a fetishist like all else. I am not here to be overly professional and sell everything. But one of the main reasons I avoid the forum as of late is a thread hijack like this. Ultimately I have experienced multiple models, fetish and amateurs alike be late, not show up, and make poor excuses timelessly so I simply stated something I do now to prevent that as best as possible. One of my biggest issues as a producer when I started was being passive and quiet about everything and it affected my life.
Sorry if I am late to the party but I don't scour every thread looking for trouble or expect to have to clarify words meant with no malicious intentions. If this is a problem then so be it, but I am not going to get into a battle over this. I thank all of those who defended me but lets not start a sexist tirade.

As per content being orientated to males only I don't agree with that at all. That market is tapped by producers who focus on that. Its exhausting for producers to go to different lengths to please all crowds hence the purpose of customs. I do have women who enjoy my content and have requested customs from me. I know there are women who watch and buy as well as its mostly women dominating the fetish market in my opinion. They kill it left and right on all angles so I do not think its a myth and I think there is a market for everyone. Its all about finding it.

Finally, as I stated above and UK did as well, taking offense to something can be completely subjective. I meant nothing bad by "my girls" but I will admit without proper context the statement as a whole can be perceived as very stand offish. So as I stated above, I have personally dealt with this and its EXTREMELY irritating and a huge waste of time. So back to the ORIGINAL purpose of the thread and heres some better advice:
This industry is hard. You are not just a customer but a fetishist. You were looking for a session and felt that heightened excitement but were let down by what felt like excuses and a lack of motivation. I will personally say that most producers and models suffer from this. There are times where I really do not wanna shoot and I have had professional fetish models text me saying they just were not in the right mindset and we move on to reschedule. It happens. Should she have been more open? absolutely. But not many are capable of that. Fetish models are still people and shit happens. My recommendation is text her kindly about how you felt and be more open about her returning for possibly another session. Maybe meet first then book the room? Hotels.com has a pay at check in option? Work that way ^_^
Hope I can help and clear everything up. Love you all and thank you for opening my eyes to something new. I know I am a producer but I am also 25. If theres one thing I know its I always can learn from others. Hope everyone has a great day/night. I am gonna go eat a shit ton of pizza and rewatch some Game of Thrones. <3

I never called you a dick and I don't think you meant to offend. I just agree with some other members here about your choice of words. You can take that however you want and do with it what you will.

I would honestly love to know more about these studios geared towards females, do you have any examples?

http://www.ticklingforum.com/showthread.php?299878-Studios-Clips-Geared-Towards-Women

 

[Comfort Eagle]

It seems to have ended by niow but...

man you guys knew what the fuck he meant.

 

[BellybTickler]

This is the greatest thread ever.

 

[magic fingers]

Not to be an alarmist, but I hope Sasha's OK. I've only met her once but she seemed like a sweetheart, and not the type of lady who would flake out and stand someone up. So I hope nothing happened to her.

 

[turtleboy]

I think I did address intent, as you paraphrased what I said. And furthermore, just because someone is offended doesn't mean the offender has to give a shit. I'm just a name on a screen like anyone else. I figured someone trying to make money in the world would choose how they express themselves publicly (or in terms of this forum anyway) in a careful manner. If they don't want to, that's fine too, but I might still comment.

I don't think there are less male gay tickle fans than there are female tickle fans as proven by your point mentioning sales as well as multiple sites and stores that appeal to them. Even a pretty well-known documentary called Tickled.... ABOUT MEN. I think most don't post here due to TMF's reputation of flaming m/m fans in the past despite trying to tout themselves as the "Flame-Free Forum" for a time.

I don't know where you would determine that I have the same resources as some hypothetical person you made up for that weird point. Either way, even the female producers again appeal to ... MEN! xD

The side panel...all tits and toes. I don't even think there has ever been an F/M pic of the week in my entire membership. I could be wrong because I'm sure I haven't seen every single one, but these are just a few examples of the boring, same-old same-old, not necessarily chauvinistic, but pretty exclusively geared to straight male lers.

I'll let another dude mansplain to me how I'm wrong tho.

A guy responding to your comments is not mansplaining.

My point about there being less gay male tickle fans than there are female tickle fans is just based on the fact that there are less gay men in the world than there are women. I mentioned this fact because there are lots of gay oriented M/M tickle productions despite there probably being a smaller number of gay men to make or watch them. In other words, there are more gay men making and paying for tickle porn than there are women. You don't see gay tickle fans complaining about the heterosexual male focus of most tickle vids, because they make and buy the vids they want to see...and so there is an active market.

I don't think that it's 'weird' to suggest that a female tickle fan such as yourself could produce and sell the sort of tickling videos that you want to see. When a guy starts a rant on these forums about all tickling videos being crap nowadays, the usual response is 'why don't you go make some videos yourself instead of complaining'. That's how new stores come about - what is preventing you or any other female tickle fan from starting a female-focused store if you believe there is the demand for it?

As for the TMF side-panel, unless I'm wrong that's basically made up of paid-for advertising. Those are the stores and websites that fund this site by advertising their content here.

 

[duderino84]

Anything said by a man is mansplaining.

Would it be a big deal if it was "my contractor/model/employee"? If there's an acceptable one, pick it.

Next.... Is there any specific content you feel appeals to women? People can lead by example or lead better content based off an example.

 

[indivision]

When I saw the word "mansplaining" used seriously, I actually checked to see if I had been somehow redirected to Twitter or Tumblr. But alas, I was still on the TMF.

 

[oldgeezer]

Not to be an alarmist, but I hope Sasha's OK. I've only met her once but she seemed like a sweetheart, and not the type of lady who would flake out and stand someone up. So I hope nothing happened to her.

I hope Sasha's OK??? Are you trying to be funny? Did you mean Tasha? After 4 pages of comments then to see I hope Sasha's OK had me laughing out loud. I hope Tasha and Sasha are both OK.

 

[vainbetrayer]

Well... that escalated quickly, but

It seems to have ended by niow but...

man you guys knew what the fuck he meant.

pretty much this.

 

[tkl-pen]

I don't understand the backlash here. I know there is a movement in the United States right now that creates a lot of animosity and too much sensitivity to even the smallest things. When he said my girls he simply meant the girls he employs in his videos and not women he owns. That is clear and should not be taken out of context.

 

[oldgeezer]

Regarding the side subject of:
tickling clips not being geared towards women's taste
vs
women rarely buy clips so why make clips for them when there is not a significant market.

I was thinking this is a bit of a catch 22.
Then I remember a clip call catch 22
I looked up the clip catch 22 ...


And guess who the tickler is.
The lovely, but allegedly not reliable, Tasha.

(I believe the OP, just being cautious)

Note: Two attractive female models suggest this clip was geared to appeal to men.

Sorry ladies.

 

[The Tickle Room]

Regarding the side subject of:
tickling clips not being geared towards women's taste
vs
women rarely buy clips so why make clips for them when there is not a significant market.

I was thinking this is a bit of a catch 22.
Then I remember a clip call catch 22
I looked up the clip catch 22 ...
View attachment 567661

And guess who the tickler is.
The lovely, but allegedly not reliable, Tasha.

(I believe the OP, just being cautious)

Note: Two attractive female models suggest this clip was geared to appeal to men.

Sorry ladies.

*GASP* ILLUMINATI!!!!!!!

 

[The Tickle Room]

Anything said by a man is mansplaining.

Would it be a big deal if it was "my contractor/model/employee"? If there's an acceptable one, pick it.

Next.... Is there any specific content you feel appeals to women? People can lead by example or lead better content based off an example.

Negative on the contractor, Model I already explained, and ya employees could work but most of these woman are my friends ^_^ So ya.
It's just a context thing and how people perceive it. Some of my models call me Dad not for a superiority thing but because they think I act like a dad. But not knowing that it would come of differently

 

[The Tickle Room]

When I saw the word "mansplaining" used seriously, I actually checked to see if I had been somehow redirected to Twitter or Tumblr. But alas, I was still on the TMF.

I actually died reading this lmaoooo

 

[duderino84]

Negative on the contractor, Model I already explained, and ya employees could work but most of these woman are my friends ^_^ So ya.
It's just a context thing and how people perceive it. Some of my models call me Dad not for a superiority thing but because they think I act like a dad. But not knowing that it would come of differently

Lol hey I was just saying alternative titles since God forbid they're "your girls" lol. glad to know you have that reputation.

 

[Oddjob0226]

While the sentiment is right, the way you talk about your models just makes you sound like the worst kind of person.

The WORST kind of person! THE WORST! EVER! *There are no other exceptions and no one lower than than the level of worst*

Let that sink in. #hastag

 

[Oddjob0226]

If I was in his shoes, I'd be pretty pissed, not gonna lie. The excuse sounds like BS, no apology, previous cancellation, plus money spent on room, fuck that shit.

Comparing a black woman's behavior ("shit") to human excrement to dehumanize her, and then the added desire to crudely have sex with the 'excrement' now that she has been dehumanized and is purely a sex object where sex is a punishment meted out by the sexual aggressor.

 

[The Tickle Room]

The WORST kind of person! THE WORST! EVER! *There are no other exceptions and no one lower than than the level of worst*

Let that sink in. #hastag

Comparing a black woman's behavior ("shit") to human excrement to dehumanize her, and then the added desire to crudely have sex with the 'excrement' now that she has been dehumanized and is purely a sex object where sex is a punishment meted out by the sexual aggressor.

I am so confused here lol. Are you trolling? Or are you trying to prove a point? When did TMF become Reddit?
WHERE AM I?!?!

 

[chicago]

Lol well I tried to turn it back to the topic at hand. Then the red pill army arrived lol

 

[ChicagoDavid]

Time for OP to make a return. Regarding one comment on the original post, Tasha is fine -- as I mentioned, she sent me a text 20 minutes after the planned start time stating that she missed her train. (Again, no apology, and waited far longer than the train departure time to mention this, even having confirmed by phone same day, and knowing that I was visiting from out of town and waiting for her. Did I mention that I didn't appreciate that?)

Regarding the comment about trying again to see her, I respectfully disagree. My life experience is, when someone makes a mistake or has something come up, you could try again (e.g., in this case, sends me a text once she has decided not to come and says something nice or apologetic). But when it's this blatant, you're much better off finding another person. There are other options out there, and you're better off giving someone who is unknown a try than going back to someone who you know would do this. (Besides, after posting this, I don't think letting her tie me up is a good idea!)

On the new topic of the post, if we focus on what is appropriate verbiage going forward, perhaps we could agree that we really should all stop referring to women over the age of 21 as girls. Yes, in narrow and specific situations, one probably can defend the use (and those situations would need to include the speaker referring to men of the same age as "boys," not "guys," because "boy" and "girl" suggest not old enough to be treated seriously as adults while "guy" does not). That phraseology is part of a broader issue of women not being treated with equal respect. There are many other examples. "I need to find a new doctor, I hope he isn't the type who always runs late" --implies that we should assume that the doctor TBD is male. Little girls hearing that can develop mental perspectives of what is an option for them. This doesn't mean that people who refer to women in their early 20's as girls are terrible people or generally disrespect women. In fact, I've heard many young women speak this way (and say, "he doesn't have the balls to do ___, even though that implies that having guts is a male trait, etc.) . Nor does this mean that this is one of our greatest societal ills --regrettably, it is not. But we all could work on this.

 

[Dolphingirl9]

Outrage culture is fucking toxic, if you live to be offended by every damned little thing someone says, you're actually the problem.

 

[The Tickle Room]

Time for OP to make a return. Regarding one comment on the original post, Tasha is fine -- as I mentioned, she sent me a text 20 minutes after the planned start time stating that she missed her train. (Again, no apology, and waited far longer than the train departure time to mention this, even having confirmed by phone same day, and knowing that I was visiting from out of town and waiting for her. Did I mention that I didn't appreciate that?)

Regarding the comment about trying again to see her, I respectfully disagree. My life experience is, when someone makes a mistake or has something come up, you could try again (e.g., in this case, sends me a text once she has decided not to come and says something nice or apologetic). But when it's this blatant, you're much better off finding another person. There are other options out there, and you're better off giving someone who is unknown a try than going back to someone who you know would do this. (Besides, after posting this, I don't think letting her tie me up is a good idea!)

On the new topic of the post, if we focus on what is appropriate verbiage going forward, perhaps we could agree that we really should all stop referring to women over the age of 21 as girls. Yes, in narrow and specific situations, one probably can defend the use (and those situations would need to include the speaker referring to men of the same age as "boys," not "guys," because "boy" and "girl" suggest not old enough to be treated seriously as adults while "guy" does not). That phraseology is part of a broader issue of women not being treated with equal respect. There are many other examples. "I need to find a new doctor, I hope he isn't the type who always runs late" --implies that we should assume that the doctor TBD is male. Little girls hearing that can develop mental perspectives of what is an option for them. This doesn't mean that people who refer to women in their early 20's as girls are terrible people or generally disrespect women. In fact, I've heard many young women speak this way (and say, "he doesn't have the balls to do ___, even though that implies that having guts is a male trait, etc.) . Nor does this mean that this is one of our greatest societal ills --regrettably, it is not. But we all could work on this.

I like this post. This post is nice.
Yes you are correct we can all work on it.
As per Tasha I completely agree with wanting to move on and find more suitable people to work with. I hope your next track to NY is a better one! For sessions I know there are many dominatrixs, Becky berardi sessions, my studio the tickle room sessions, and there are plenty of other fetishists out here as well. So I'm sure you will find some more reliable people in the long run ^_^

 

[chicago]

Outrage culture is fucking toxic, if you live to be offended by every damned little thing someone says, you're actually the problem.

Outrage is a bit hyperbolic I feel like.

Thanks Chicago David for that great post.

I do hope you will post about any further sessions you have and definitely wish they turn out better for you.