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The Scandalous Rumor Thread

I heard that Kered's neighbors insert their earplugs at 7:06pm each night, no matter what they are doing, and pray that Kered gets struck by lightning. But that never happens; he belts out the lyrics to "There's A Storm In My Heart For The Weathergirl" without fail.
Sometimes he dances while singing the lyrics.:cry1:
 
I heard that Helena was the first poster child for Planned Parenthood.
 
:wow::wow::wow:
I heard that Kered's little black book only contains names ending in M.D.
 
I heard that Helena's breath is so bad that she does stunt double work in Godzilla movies.
 
:2poke::2poke::2poke:
I heard that when Kered went out with his new lady friend, he sunk his teeth into a steak, and they stayed there. He gummed his date goodnight! Nice job.
 
I heard that Helena's last date was see throwing himself into the Atlantic Ocean.
 
:wowzer::wowzer:
I heard that when Kered's girlfriend called him on his cell, she warned him that there was a truck on television going the wrong way on the highway she knew he was traveling on.
"Heck," said Kered. "It's not just one car. It's hundreds of them!"
OOPSY!
 
:wowzer::wowzer:
I heard that when Kered went to see Godzilla at the movies, he couldn't help but comment, to his one night stand from Hooters, "The last time I came to the movies, popcorn was only 15 cents."

"Well, sir," she replied with a grin, "You're really going to enjoy yourself. The movies have sound now.."
 
I heard that when Helena goes to the movies she is not allowed to sit in the balcony for fear of a collapse.
 
:justlips:
The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs. At least that's what Kered said.
 
:ermm:
The fastest way to meet new people is to pick up somebody else's change at a cocktail bar. That's what MrPartickler does.
 
I heard that someone captured Helena's mating call on tape.😱
 
:2poke:
I heard that when Mils was shopping at Walmart, he said, "Well knock me down and steal muh teeth! That's one sexy pink tube top! Let me git the matchin' undies!"
 
:2poke:
I heard that when Mils was shopping at Walmart, he said, "Well knock me down and steal muh teeth! That's one sexy pink tube top! Let me git the matchin' undies!"

I heard Kered decided he wanted that pink-tube top for himself. I heard he grabbed it out of Mils hand, and ran to the shoe department for matching platform sandals!!!!!!!😱😱
 
I heard that Helena got her toenails painted. All thirteen of them!:xlime:
 
I heard that Natural Tickler was arrested in Wrigley Field for indecent exposure because he mooned the umpires. 😛
 
I heard Kered's toenails give off a radiant yellow light; if you look directly at them, you'll go blind!:idunno:
 
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