Would you let someone else tickle your wife?

[xSamanthax]

"Talk to your wife about that. She's the one who came into this thread telling us we were all insecure."

I most certainly did not.

I explained why it is often perceived as being insecure.

 

[drew70]

aliaxs, you are comparing apples to oranges.

expecting your wife to be loyal to you, then watching porn does not make you a hypocrite. I do not expect my gf to not have to sexual urges towards others, I know that is impossible, what I do expect is for her to control herself in a civilized manner and keep the promises she has made to me. I only expect from her what I readily do for her.

It is not a matter of being insecure. and we are not against sexual women, you would be hard pressed to find a man that is against that. Humans are animals, we have tons of urges, suppressing those urges does not make you a prude, or controlling, or fanatical. Im sure you have felt the urge to beat the crap out of someone before, but you didnt...because you are civilized. Well, its our view that to be in a civilized relationship that we be devout to one another. and as defined by dictionary.com, you can not be devout to more then one.

I agree completely. Well said, Happyman.

 

[LindyHopper]

Samantha and Alias: it sounds like you have a wonderful relationship. I just wanted to tell you that I admire the communication, strength, and confidence it takes to chart your own course, as you obviously have. I think many people see a question like, "Would you let someone else tickle your wife?" and get as far as "Hell, no!" without reflecting on why they feel that way. Nor do they really need to stop and reflect, because monogamy is such a well-lit, clearly-marked path. Choosing a less conventional approach is obviously much more challenging, and I think it's great when people are willing to take on such a challenge in the cause of finding greater happiness for themselves and their partners. 🙂


As for the original question... honestly, it just rubs me the wrong way. "Would you let someone else tickle your wife?" as if the husband is in charge of what his wife will or will not do. I think if you want to put your hands on a woman, you ought to be asking her for her permission, whether or not she's someone else's wife.

 

[Ray<3tiklishft]

By other guys, NO! By another female, OK

I always wished that she and some of my former lees (ex-girlfriends) would have a small gathering and tickle each other crazy. (I'm selfish, self-centered, etc. yada yada yada, I know.)

I can dream, can't I?

 

[BellaRisa]

Enough already 🙂

I've watched this type of thread fall down the same sad rabbit hole of judgemental nastiness too many times over the years. It's a shame to see it happening once again.

Normally I'm not the "cumbayah, can't we all get along" kind of person, in fact I find that annoying since I enjoy a good debate as much as anyone if not moreso 😎. But this is one of those discussions where I'd love to see opinions continue but I honestly don't think there are right answers, because we all have such different *yet equally valuable* comfort zones. People who prefer to keep their sexuality between their partner and themselves aren't necessarily insecure, that's just where their sexuality falls and what they need for peace of mind and heart. I absolutely understand that; we ALL have our boundaries, activities sexual or otherwise that we don't want to involve anyone but our life partner. There's nothing wrong with that. Monogamous folks aren't always insecure, and non-monogamous folks aren't always wanton sluts. Sometimes 😛, but not always. We just live differently, nothing more. I've been happily married for 15 yrs this August, and we've been actively poly-fidelitous for 10 of those years. It's what's good for us and our little tribe, but it's not for everyone, nor should it be, and we recognize that. The question shouldn't be whether it's right, but whether everyone concerned is satisfied and happy; the rest isn't for anyone else to frown upon

 

[BellaRisa]

As for the original question... honestly, it just rubs me the wrong way. "Would you let someone else tickle your wife?" as if the husband is in charge of what his wife will or will not do. I think if you want to put your hands on a woman, you ought to be asking her for her permission, whether or not she's someone else's wife.

I was thinking that too, good point.

Unless she's collared, but that's a whole 'nother thread 😎

 

[Redmage]

By other guys, NO! By another female, OK

I've never understood this attitude. Sexual play is sexual play, no matter the gender of the players. And if it's not sexual then what difference does gender make anyway?

 

[Barlow]

"Would you let someone else tickle your wife?" as if the husband is in charge of what his wife will or will not do. I think if you want to put your hands on a woman, you ought to be asking her for her permission, whether or not she's someone else's wife.

I think he meant, "Would you be angry if someone else tickled your wife." At least that's how I read it. 🙂

 

[drew70]

By other guys, NO! By another female, OK

I've never understood this attitude. Sexual play is sexual play, no matter the gender of the players. And if it's not sexual then what difference does gender make anyway?

Red, from a completely unbiased big picture view, I agree with your statements. Sexual play is sexual play and from a standpoint of pure logic, it shouldn't matter.

However, I believe that being bisexual, you may not fully comprehend the male heterosexual mindset. To us pure heterosexuals, REAL sex is between a man and a woman. Now before you go into a liberal outrage, let me qualify. This isn't to say that gay and lesbian relationships don't have sex that is real to them. Of course they do. When I say REAL sex, I'm talking about the kind of sex that matters most to us - The kind of sex that's in alignment with our own gender preference. To us heterosexuals, the sex that's real to us is sex between a man and a woman. That's going to be the kind of sex that matters most to us.

This is why many hetersexual guys aren't bothered by seeing their significant other playing sexually with another woman. Many in fact would take great pleasure in it. We're not threatened by it because we look at such play as somewhat superficial. That other woman can't give my wife REAL sex, but another man can.

I hope that helps you to understand this attitude and why so many of us hold to it. It seems that in today's day and age, the focus is all about accepting and understanding the gay, lesbian, and bisexual communities. But if society is going to work, we all need to understand and accept the heterosexual community as well.

 

[usp45]

I have always fantasized about another guy tickling my wife and she and I have discussed in several times and she came to the conclusion that setting it up with a stranger was not a good idea but did say that if it was spontaneous, like at a party where (she gave this example) a couple of guys held her down and tickled her would porbably be fun.
The subject came up unexpectedly the other night while we were going to get something to eat, we never have talked about tickling outside of our bedroom except when we were first dating.
Along the way to strike up some intersting conversation, I told her about how afriend of ours told me recently about some mutual friends of ours in that they were swingers and how the husband got caught up with the other female and had an affair on her and his wife found out about it.
They are working their way through it now but my wife immediatly said " that's sick! I don't feel sorry for her , what did she expect would happen?"
Kelley went on to say " that's a risk you take when you do something like that." "That would be like me liking a man you set up to tickle me, you know what if I ended up liking being tickled tortured by another man even if I didn't start out to, but it just happed, what would you think then ?"
I said to Kelley "but you hate being tickled " but she said "yes I do but what would happen if something clicked in me and I liked for this guy to tickle me all the time?"
For a second I thought she was trying to be a tease but I realized she was serious and she went on to say that she was very secure in our relationship and was happy but also said when you start doing things like that (tickling arrangements) it could lead to some trouble.
Kelley said "what if I let you tie up one of my girlfriends or for that matter a stranger and I let you tickle her, don't you think you would be attracted to her?"
She went on to say that she even knows that there would be some crazy bond between her and some guy who tickled her for extended periods of time. She said "think about it, here's a guy who has me tied down, completely helpless and he tickles the hell out of me on and off for an hour, not just for a minute or two, but for an hour."
"Tickling for extended periods of time are really intimate in a way if you think about it. Picture me tied down with a guy straddling my waist mercilessly tickling my sides for 15 minutes straight, he's basically laying on me for this whole time, you know he's got to be getting turned on and sorry but I would probably get turned on too with no choice about it" and she continued to say " I know you would love to see someone tickle my feet but for some reason I don't find that to be so personal because if my feet were tied to the end of the bed he wouldn't have to lay on them like he would my waist and upper body."
I couldn't believe what I was hearing, Kelley was actually analizing the whole thing and without trying, I was getting turned on more and more as she calmly and objectivly talked about it.
Kelley went on to say that the "crazy bond" between her and her tickler would come from him having so much power over her, the ability to make her scream and laugh, and most importantly she said would be to make her beg for mercy while being relentlessly tickled.
She concluded by saying with a sexy smirk " still want some guy tying me up and tickling me to death?"
I told her "no, of course not" and she seemed to like that answer and screwed with me later on that night by saying "you know, it might be fun having a couple of guys tickle me to death." I knew she was just trying to tease me because on the way home she went into detail about what they might do to her and I found myself exceeding the speed limit on our way home.
So under these circumstances I would have to say that I would be unsure about letting another man tickle my wife but I guarantee I will certainly encourage it if the situation arrises thats as she says, spontaneous and not pre planned.

 

[schitzo_within]

I would let someone tickle my gf or wife. As long as it stops at just tickling. I had a gf who was tickled by guys and girls. I actually held her down and while four girls and three guys tickled her....that was pretty intense..I had to lay on my stomach after they were done so my hard on wouldn't show.

 

[Swertz]

No

MY WIFE HATE'S ME TICKLING HER

 

[TinyTickler]

absoultly not if i am dating someone or married to them the only one who can tickle them is me call it jealousy but thats how i feel i believe that if i share something as special as tickling with the person i love i would never consider the thought of someone else tickling them but me

 

[nylontickler(m)]

No chance

Yet, ironically. I would be willing to tickle someone else's wife. I am SO SELFISH!

 

[footguy5000]

Even though my wife hates it when I tickle her, I would allow someone else to tickle her as long as it stopped at that. She would never allow anyone else but me to tickle her though.