Young adults and being sexually responsible [slight rant]

[chicago]

I just got a text message from my best guy friend. It said "Where can I get the morning after pill?"

You know what that means.

This is something that many people have to face at one point in their lives, but this kid has had to face this type of scare three other times.

As his friend, I worry about it, and don't want to see his life go down the drain over something like this, so I told him where to get it, and then I ripped him a new one.

And then there was another young man I knew who had a huge pregnancy scare with an ex girlfriend.

Ridiculous!

I really don't understand how people my age, if they're going to fuck like rabbits (and they probably are), can't at least be responsible enough to take care of themselves.

Condoms are easily purchased at any drug store in America. Birth control, is also easily accessible. I know most young women are afraid of their parents finding out, but 1. Parents should be the ones helping their children in this type of situation and 2. you don't need your parents to get it anyway.

Sorry, I try not to rant on these threads, but I have been thinking about this problem for a while and it really bothers me.

Kids my age are so irresponsible.

</end-rant>

What are your opinions on this subject?

 

[maniactickler]

I tend to agree.

 

[steph]

Mph. I dunno. The world is a different place than when I was your age. My father's wife worked with the CDC, she was an infection control consultant. I knew about AIDS 10 years before it ever made news. I was a virgin until second semester college. And I ALWAYS carried condoms in my purse. Strangers would approach me at parties~"You're her, right? The condom girl? I have five bucks..."
XOXO

 

[storm7400]

Teen and young adult pregnancy is definitely a problem in this country and is the fault of many including first and foremost the "kids" that are having the unprotected sex, the parents of these kids who are obviously not teaching them about safe sex and even our own government which is a sad state of affairs. The idiot in charge wants the government to preach abstinence over safe sex, WTF!!!!! Its human nature to procreate and to do this a man and a woman need to have sex, and thanks to the sexual revolution and the invention of birth control methods a man and woman can now have sex as much as they desire without the worries of pregnancy. Safe sex methods should be taught from the day "kids" enter high school because peer pressure and puberty are a lethal combination that will almost always win out against abstinence. Now I'm not trying to alleviate the irresponsible "kids" who have unprotected sex in any way, but more so be a problem solver. We all have sex I assume and we all are aware of of methods of protection, with that I'm sure we all had a scare and one would hope that would be enough to curve this irresponsible behavior. I for one had a scare the first time I had sex, and thankfully the girl wasn't pregnant. I mean my first time and there I was staring at the rest of my life at 17 and trying to figure out how I could possibly raise a child! I learned my lesson about safe sex from that and continue that lesson to this day and will until I'm ready to settle down and bring children into this world. Now if only more people would practice this sentiment..........

 

[chicago]

Mph. I dunno. The world is a different place than when I was your age. My father's wife worked with the CDC, she was an infection control consultant. I knew about AIDS 10 years before it ever made news. I was a virgin until second semester college. And I ALWAYS carried condoms in my purse. Strangers would approach me at parties~"You're her, right? The condom girl? I have five bucks..."
XOXO

So you don't agree?

All I'm saying is, if one thinks they are "mature enough" to engage in sexual intercourse, they should be mature enough to take the steps to be safe.

 

[Azrael]

...

I've never had a bad experience with a condom. I've never found it to be degrading to the sensation in any way. Everybody I know who is actively sexual, uses condoms... no exceptions. There's simply no excuse to not use protection. It's not embarrassing, or shouldn't be; it is not difficult. If you can't use it, for whatever reason (you're out of them, and the drugstore's closed), you do something else, or wait until the next day, or whatever. Carry an emergency rubber in your wallet if you're that horny.



As far as birth control, there are other reasons to be on it. I've been close with a few women who weren't being overly active, sexually, who were on birth control to help control excessive cramping during PMS, and such. Also, as it's something which needs to be done on an organized basis, one can simply say "I'm starting now, to be prepared."

 

[chicago]

I've never had a bad experience with a condom. I've never found it to be degrading to the sensation in any way. Everybody I know who is actively sexual, uses condoms... no exceptions. There's simply no excuse to not use protection. It's not embarrassing, or shouldn't be; it is not difficult. If you can't use it, for whatever reason (you're out of them, and the drugstore's closed), you do something else, or wait until the next day, or whatever. Carry an emergency rubber in your wallet if you're that horny.



As far as birth control, there are other reasons to be on it. I've been close with a few women who weren't being overly active, sexually, who were on birth control to help control excessive cramping during PMS, and such. Also, as it's something which needs to be done on an organized basis, one can simply say "I'm starting now, to be prepared."

The fact is, he almost always uses a condom, but like some men he feels it takes away from the over-all sensation. So right now he's been playing the pull-out game. Which is a game often lost. That being said, two of the past times where he had a pregnancy scare has been from breaking said condom.

Either the kid can't read, or he needs a new lesson in how to use condoms.

It's not just about condoms, though. It's also about getting tested, and it's also about the female doing her part as well.

Teen and young adult pregnancy is definitely a problem in this country and is the fault of many including first and foremost the "kids" that are having the unprotected sex, the parents of these kids who are obviously not teaching them about safe sex and even our own government which is a sad state of affairs. The idiot in charge wants the government to preach abstinence over safe sex, WTF!!!!! Its human nature to procreate and to do this a man and a woman need to have sex, and thanks to the sexual revolution and the invention of birth control methods a man and woman can now have sex as much as they desire without the worries of pregnancy. Safe sex methods should be taught from the day "kids" enter high school because peer pressure and puberty are a lethal combination that will almost always win out against abstinence. Now I'm not trying to alleviate the irresponsible "kids" who have unprotected sex in any way, but more so be a problem solver. We all have sex I assume and we all are aware of of methods of protection, with that I'm sure we all had a scare and one would hope that would be enough to curve this irresponsible behavior. I for one had a scare the first time I had sex, and thankfully the girl wasn't pregnant. I mean my first time and there I was staring at the rest of my life at 17 and trying to figure out how I could possibly raise a child! I learned my lesson about safe sex from that and continue that lesson to this day and will until I'm ready to settle down and bring children into this world. Now if only more people would practice this sentiment..........

Well, the school that my friend and I attended taught about sex in 8th grade. We had a review in freshman year of high school where all forms of safe sex were taught. And still, I understand things can be confusing, but I feel at this stage, he's probably been having sex for a few years now, way longer than I have, and he hasn't learned his lesson since the first time he was sitting with his girlfriend doubting his future.

It's frustrating, because he's come out lucky the past three times, and I feel if he doesn't at least try something more, he's going to find his luck run out.


But I agree, teaching abstinence does more harm than good.

 

[Iggy pop]

In my opinion, unless you are trying to have a child, every guy should use a condom and every woman should be on the pill. The pill is the most effective birth control out there barring abstinence or vasectomy.

 

[chicago]

In my opinion, unless you are trying to have a child, every guy should use a condom and every woman should be on the pill. The pill is the most effective birth control out there barring abstinence or vasectomy.

I agree.

Although vasectomy is my favorite form of birth control.

Just kidding 😀

 

[Tickle Fiend]

I just got a text message from my best guy friend. It said "Where can I get the morning after pill?"

You know what that means.

This is something that many people have to face at one point in their lives, but this kid has had to face this type of scare three other times.

As his friend, I worry about it, and don't want to see his life go down the drain over something like this, so I told him where to get it, and then I ripped him a new one.

And then there was another young man I knew who had a huge pregnancy scare with an ex girlfriend.

Ridiculous!

I really don't understand how people my age, if they're going to fuck like rabbits (and they probably are), can't at least be responsible enough to take care of themselves.

Condoms are easily purchased at any drug store in America. Birth control, is also easily accessible. I know most young women are afraid of their parents finding out, but 1. Parents should be the ones helping their children in this type of situation and 2. you don't need your parents to get it anyway.

Sorry, I try not to rant on these threads, but I have been thinking about this problem for a while and it really bothers me.

Kids my age are so irresponsible.

</end-rant>

What are your opinions on this subject?

I disagree with a general statement like that. The people I know use condoms all the time and take the steps necessary to avoid situations like this. Accidental pregnancy isn't just a problem for younger people. Older people will likely have the means necessary to take care of a kid but that doesn't mean they're ready or any more responsible. Obviously there are people like your friend who are going to have to learn the hard way about this, but he doesn't represent young people IMO.

 

[chicago]

I disagree with a general statement like that. The people I know use condoms all the time and take the steps necessary to avoid situations like this. Accidental pregnancy isn't just a problem for younger people. Older people will likely have the means necessary to take care of a kid but that doesn't mean they're ready or any more responsible. Obviously there are people like your friend who are going to have to learn the hard way about this, but he doesn't represent young people IMO.

Well I'm not basing my opinion entirely on my one friend. I'm basing it on other friends, other personal experiences, statistics, etc. Involving sex, drugs, and other dangerous activities.

19 year olds aren't widely known for their responsible, mature natures.

 

[Midnight Circus]

Giggle: I hate our generation for this very reason. No self-control and, barring that, no sense to make the lack of self-control mostly harmless.

 

[Iggy pop]

I agree.

Although vasectomy is my favorite form of birth control.

Just kidding 😀

Well I guess that is better than castration being your favorite form of birth control.

 

[Tickle Fiend]

Well I'm not basing my opinion entirely on my one friend. I'm basing it on other friends, other personal experiences, statistics, etc. Involving sex, drugs, and other dangerous activities.

19 year olds aren't widely known for their responsible, mature natures.

Yeah I know, I'm just saying that it happens to all age groups, except older people have the money to support a kid. I agree though younger people do stupid shit because I do it too. Not the sex stuff, but I make mistakes that young people make, but my age shouldn't be an excuse.

 

[sabaki]

I know a kid who was being irresponsible with birth control and got his girlfriend pregnant (it was equally her fault, I suppose). But when they found out, the two of them stuck together and dealt with the issue responsibly, I think: he supported her, she gave birth, and together they gave the child up for an open adoption. That doesn't make up for the initial irresponsibility and incredible stupidity of not using birth control, but it helps a little.

I guess I'm trying to say that people do sometimes make mistakes, and how they behave in response to the mistake can show character too. Making a mistake four times in a row though, that's not good.

 

[Midnight Circus]

That's one problem with the morning after pill, IMO. It's an ever-present mulligan. No one has to grow up and take responsibility because, hey, you can just flush the "problem" out of your system. Brilliant.

 

[chicago]

I am pro-choice, but not when that choice is to use abortion or the morning after pill as a form of birth control.

 

[Midnight Circus]

The only time I would even consider being pro-choice would be in a catch-22 situation where the both the mother and child will certainly die if she does not abort the child, and even then it's a bit sketchy to me. I just can't logically justify any other use of the procedure.

 

[Redmage]

Sad to say, Mairead, parents can't always help legally. A mother in Wisconsin was arrested for buying her 13 yr old son condoms, because she knew he was having sex with his 15 yr old girlfriend and she didn't interfere.

The thing I remember about being a teen is either not knowing all the curves life could throw at me or thinking that it wouldn't happen to me. Impulsive behavior or not thinking through all the consequences is a hallmark of that age range. Most of the time the falls we take are things that we can get up from, thankfully. Unfortunately that just reinforces our idea that nothing REALLY bad will happen. It usually takes a near miss to convince us otherwise.

 

[chicago]

I don't want this to turn into an abortion debate, as that's not what it's really about.


And Redmage, I see your point, but a 20 year old couple no longer has that excuse.

What I meant when I mentioned parents was that, they shouldn't use fear as a parenting tool. I'd much rather know what my children are doing and be able to help them, and have them be comfortable coming to me to talk, than find something out the hard way.

 

[Tickle Fiend]

I'm pro-choice and I'm okay with someone using abortion as birth control, as long as it's safe.

 

[Midnight Circus]

I don't want this to turn into an abortion debate, as that's not what it's really about.

In a perfect world, sexual irresponsibility and abortion would be mutually exclusive. If you don't want to discuss it, that's fine, but I wouldn't necessarily say that it's "not what it's really about."

I'm pro-choice and I'm okay with someone using abortion as birth control, as long as it's safe.

"Safe" is a relative term, as it's most certainly unsafe for at least one party involved. But I digress.

 

[storm7400]

I remember at 16 my parents offered to buy me condoms anytime if I felt ashamed about it. That's good parenting, although I did feel ashamed when I had to ask my dad what size, that was an awkward moment! Good thing Dad was smart enough to call my doctor to find out.

 

[cloudgazer2k]

a quandry of a pickle there...
like alot of these hip, young cats on this forum, i came from a school where more girls were graduating as mommies, and more guys were graduating as over-sexed bums. i can only guess how crazy things would have gotten if the Morning After pill had been approved during my junior-senior years in high school. such a drug makes such a bad choice to have a new fuck buddy every other day all too easy to make, and it is rather depressing.

 

[Highway101]

In my opinion, unless you are trying to have a child, every guy should use a condom and every woman should be on the pill. The pill is the most effective birth control out there barring abstinence or vasectomy.

So simple and yet so true.