Many of those in that position will tell you that they will never forget it.It still doesn't change the fact that being in that position requires some nasty action on your part or you will become the recipient of your opponent's action.
If one feels his or her actions were justified,they could well have far less trouble dealing with it....."Him or me"....and that is usually the case.
Not including those few exceptions,nobody likes war...that's why we try to avoid it.