-
If you would like to get your account Verified, read this thread -
Check out Tickling.com - the most innovative tickling site of the year. -
The TMF is sponsored by Clips4sale - By supporting them, you're supporting us. -
>>> If you cannot get into your account email me at [email protected] <<<
Don't forget to include your username
Taking A Turn For The Worst..
- Thread starter Mitchell
- Start date
I have no patience with opportunistic, egotistical clergymen who see every "deathbed conversion" as a notch on their bible. That's a perversion of religion, in my opinion. Good on you for getting that pest to piss off.
Thanks kop.
After a good night last night, this morning was awful. My mom was in a huge amount of pain, screaming "Oh my God" constantly. They gave her a bunch of meds, and.. when I left to come down here for lunch, she was sleeping. I'm hopeful that continues.
I'm still in limbo about the move. If it doesnt happen tomorrow, I'm going to go home for the day. If it does, I have to stay here, accompany her, sign her in, and get home very late. I'll try to keep everyone posted.
Mitch
After a good night last night, this morning was awful. My mom was in a huge amount of pain, screaming "Oh my God" constantly. They gave her a bunch of meds, and.. when I left to come down here for lunch, she was sleeping. I'm hopeful that continues.
I'm still in limbo about the move. If it doesnt happen tomorrow, I'm going to go home for the day. If it does, I have to stay here, accompany her, sign her in, and get home very late. I'll try to keep everyone posted.
Mitch
My mom is in a lot of pain today. It's heartbreaking to watch. Even worse, she refuses pain meds, because.. as the nurses and doctors told me, the rationale part of the brain is the part that is affected. Sigh! I was told to give her some space. I left for 30-60 mins. I'm hopeful she will agree to take meds.
I still dont know if'we're going to the home tomorrow. They said we may not know until tomorrow morning, but someone said they dont think they will let us know, and transfer her in the same day. I dont know. If we dont go to the home tomorrow, I'm going to get out of here for a few hours, and go back to my apartment. I seriously need a break.
Mitch
I still dont know if'we're going to the home tomorrow. They said we may not know until tomorrow morning, but someone said they dont think they will let us know, and transfer her in the same day. I dont know. If we dont go to the home tomorrow, I'm going to get out of here for a few hours, and go back to my apartment. I seriously need a break.
Mitch
And. the problem is complete..
After unsuccessfully trying to find a home in the area, my mom is going to the far away one. Additionally, I had asked the home and social workers at the hosp to give me 24 hrs notice, both to have time to try and break it to my mom, and to ready the legistics. Well.. none of that happened. We're going in an hr. My family was pissed too. My mom will go up by ambulance, the driver will take me. I'll settle my mom in, then come home tonight. I know shes going to hate me when I leave her there! Sigh! I hate leaving her, but as difficult as it will be to be in the apartment alone, maybe it will be an advantage to have time to myself.
I'll be online tonight when I get home. Not sure what time. Thanks again. My family and friends support in this ordeal has been instrumental in my getting through this, and I know the worst is yet to come.
Mitch
After unsuccessfully trying to find a home in the area, my mom is going to the far away one. Additionally, I had asked the home and social workers at the hosp to give me 24 hrs notice, both to have time to try and break it to my mom, and to ready the legistics. Well.. none of that happened. We're going in an hr. My family was pissed too. My mom will go up by ambulance, the driver will take me. I'll settle my mom in, then come home tonight. I know shes going to hate me when I leave her there! Sigh! I hate leaving her, but as difficult as it will be to be in the apartment alone, maybe it will be an advantage to have time to myself.
I'll be online tonight when I get home. Not sure what time. Thanks again. My family and friends support in this ordeal has been instrumental in my getting through this, and I know the worst is yet to come.
Mitch
Mitch.. Alone..
No, my mom thankfully hasnt passed away yet. She was fine, Thank God, when I left the nursing home, and I will be going to see her tomorrow.. but.. for really the first time in my life.,. except for when I had singles when roommates were kicked out in college, and when my mom has gone away for weekends, I'm alone.. for good.. until and unless I meet a live in GF or wife, or take in a roommate.
I know, the old taunts: Mitch is 42 and lived with his mom. I've already posted about why that is.
As everyone knows, the reason for me being alone now is heartbreaking. My mom has gone to a nursing home near Reading, to die. Of course, we dont know how long that will be. I'm going to try to get her into the nursing home's facility in Lancaster, so I dont have to incur huge expense, and have the driver have to take me all that way every day.
The only time someone else will be here with me is when my aunt comes for 2-3 days, and maybe,.,. if my dad stays over if he helps me pack before I move out. When I move to NY, I'm moving into my own apt. I dont plan to have a roommate.
I have a computer, extensive cable TV system, for now, my friends to chat with, and will be talking to my friend Adam and my dad later tonight.
My plan now is to rest until after my aunt leaves next week, except to go see my mom every day, and then ready the apartment.
It's going to take some getting used to. The nights may be the hardest. Thank heaven for internet, phone, movies, and cable TV. Maybe God wont save my mom, but he did save me by allowing others to create such distractions.
Mitch
No, my mom thankfully hasnt passed away yet. She was fine, Thank God, when I left the nursing home, and I will be going to see her tomorrow.. but.. for really the first time in my life.,. except for when I had singles when roommates were kicked out in college, and when my mom has gone away for weekends, I'm alone.. for good.. until and unless I meet a live in GF or wife, or take in a roommate.
I know, the old taunts: Mitch is 42 and lived with his mom. I've already posted about why that is.
As everyone knows, the reason for me being alone now is heartbreaking. My mom has gone to a nursing home near Reading, to die. Of course, we dont know how long that will be. I'm going to try to get her into the nursing home's facility in Lancaster, so I dont have to incur huge expense, and have the driver have to take me all that way every day.
The only time someone else will be here with me is when my aunt comes for 2-3 days, and maybe,.,. if my dad stays over if he helps me pack before I move out. When I move to NY, I'm moving into my own apt. I dont plan to have a roommate.
I have a computer, extensive cable TV system, for now, my friends to chat with, and will be talking to my friend Adam and my dad later tonight.
My plan now is to rest until after my aunt leaves next week, except to go see my mom every day, and then ready the apartment.
It's going to take some getting used to. The nights may be the hardest. Thank heaven for internet, phone, movies, and cable TV. Maybe God wont save my mom, but he did save me by allowing others to create such distractions.
Mitch
Living alone is the best situation for a guy looking at settling down. The only better situation I can think of is to live with a social person with many friends and women that they can introduce you to. If you're serious about finding a woman this is a great step in the right direction.
GQ
GQ
GEORGIATKLER
3rd Level Yellow Feather
- Joined
- Nov 27, 2003
- Messages
- 3,533
- Points
- 36
Be sure to get some moderate exercise each day. A brief walk outside will help with the mental burdens and a change of scenery is always a plus. I am glad you have friends and family to offer some support. I wish you the best in handling a tough situation.
Thanks, GQ. While I understand and appreciate what you're saying, the emotional aspect of how this occurred, is the difficult part. Even my family understands that.
Say, for example.. I had moved out because I had enough money to do so, which I havent. Or.. my mom kicked me out. Or.. My mom asked me to find my own place, because she was moving in with a man. Those scenarios would have been very easy for me to adjust to.. This.. my mom being forced into a nursing home, and then passing away. the whole emotional aspect of it is different.
As I've posted over the past two weeks.,. my dad has been really nice since I called him. I'm thankful for his support. He just called me a bit ago. I calmly said to him.. "Being here without my mother is very difficult", and he said he understands.
As for girls.. all I can say is this.. even if the kindest.. most intelligent.. most beautiful.. most ticklish. girl with the nicest feet presented themselves to me, and offered to play tickle bandit games with me forever, and stand barefoot on a million and one ladders for me for the rest of my life, presented herself to me.. my answer at this point would probably be something like "You're very sweet, and thank you, but the most I can offer now is friendship.. maybe in the future.. when this horrible thing that is going to happen to me.. is over".
My aunts and my dad think my brain is racing too hard. They were all like "You need to take care of yourself, or you're going to get sick". I know this. For two years, Mitch has worried about nothing but mom. Now.. for the rest of her life.. the nurses and doctors at the nursing home will take care of mom. I still worry about her 24-7. Every time the phone rang tonight, my heart was in my mouth.
I know this will just take some getting used to. My plan is to just chill until after my aunt leaves, and then start to ready the apartment. I guess at this point I have to try to take it one day at a time, cherish, and be thankful for, every day with my mom, because I know that likely, there tragically wont be many left.
Mitch
Say, for example.. I had moved out because I had enough money to do so, which I havent. Or.. my mom kicked me out. Or.. My mom asked me to find my own place, because she was moving in with a man. Those scenarios would have been very easy for me to adjust to.. This.. my mom being forced into a nursing home, and then passing away. the whole emotional aspect of it is different.
As I've posted over the past two weeks.,. my dad has been really nice since I called him. I'm thankful for his support. He just called me a bit ago. I calmly said to him.. "Being here without my mother is very difficult", and he said he understands.
As for girls.. all I can say is this.. even if the kindest.. most intelligent.. most beautiful.. most ticklish. girl with the nicest feet presented themselves to me, and offered to play tickle bandit games with me forever, and stand barefoot on a million and one ladders for me for the rest of my life, presented herself to me.. my answer at this point would probably be something like "You're very sweet, and thank you, but the most I can offer now is friendship.. maybe in the future.. when this horrible thing that is going to happen to me.. is over".
My aunts and my dad think my brain is racing too hard. They were all like "You need to take care of yourself, or you're going to get sick". I know this. For two years, Mitch has worried about nothing but mom. Now.. for the rest of her life.. the nurses and doctors at the nursing home will take care of mom. I still worry about her 24-7. Every time the phone rang tonight, my heart was in my mouth.
I know this will just take some getting used to. My plan is to just chill until after my aunt leaves, and then start to ready the apartment. I guess at this point I have to try to take it one day at a time, cherish, and be thankful for, every day with my mom, because I know that likely, there tragically wont be many left.
Mitch
I took my mom to the home in Reading today. She didnt seem too upset when I left her there. I'm praying shes okay and comfortable. I will see her tomorrow.
When I got home, I wrote a letter to the president of the nursing home company , trying to appeal to him to move my mom to the home in Lancaster ASAP. i cited the distance, financial reasons, and that I dont drive. I have a feeling that my parents wanted to have input to the letter, but I wanted it to come from the concerned son, so I decided to do it myself. I did forward it to my dad after I sent it, and he said it was very well written. I have no idea if it will do any good, but I'm hopeful.
Mitch
When I got home, I wrote a letter to the president of the nursing home company , trying to appeal to him to move my mom to the home in Lancaster ASAP. i cited the distance, financial reasons, and that I dont drive. I have a feeling that my parents wanted to have input to the letter, but I wanted it to come from the concerned son, so I decided to do it myself. I did forward it to my dad after I sent it, and he said it was very well written. I have no idea if it will do any good, but I'm hopeful.
Mitch
It's tough no doubt. Personally I'd look at it more like growing up. Just like when I left home for college or left for the military. It's tough, but it was a step in the right direction for me to realize my goals. That's just me. But if you look at it as fate ripping your life apart it will be painful. If you look at it as fate giving you an opportunity then there might be some excitement. Thinking positively like this is no easy task however and is much easier said than done.
The grief and reality of loneliness will be covered by your mind. Being external to the situation I think it helps to focus on the bright side....the start of a new exciting life.
GQ
The grief and reality of loneliness will be covered by your mind. Being external to the situation I think it helps to focus on the bright side....the start of a new exciting life.
GQ
I see what you're saying, GQ, I know your advice is sincere, and I appreciate it.
'
My first night alone didnt go too badly. I basically did much the same thing as I would have if my mom was here. I watched the 11pm news as I do every night, spent time online, took my Xanax, and slept for 4-5 hrs.
In a crazy way, maybe this time spent alone while my mom is still alive, will help in easing into when she does pass away. I know that I will still be very upset, because I wont be able to go visit her, but.. my home life both now, and after, will be much the same.
Mitch
'
My first night alone didnt go too badly. I basically did much the same thing as I would have if my mom was here. I watched the 11pm news as I do every night, spent time online, took my Xanax, and slept for 4-5 hrs.
In a crazy way, maybe this time spent alone while my mom is still alive, will help in easing into when she does pass away. I know that I will still be very upset, because I wont be able to go visit her, but.. my home life both now, and after, will be much the same.
Mitch
Mitch i've never lived alone in my entire life...i went straight from my parent's home to my home with my husband...i understand where you're coming from...i've often wondered how i'll deal with it, if and when my husband should die...
What i might advise is to get a kitten...that way you won't be truly alone...a kitten can be therapeutic, fun to watch, easy to care for...and can be left alone far easier than a dog...
Also yes...get out and walk or something every day...or take up reading...i'm alone a great deal during the day and i set myself goals and read a good deal...if you are reading a book, you are never truly alone...
What i might advise is to get a kitten...that way you won't be truly alone...a kitten can be therapeutic, fun to watch, easy to care for...and can be left alone far easier than a dog...
Also yes...get out and walk or something every day...or take up reading...i'm alone a great deal during the day and i set myself goals and read a good deal...if you are reading a book, you are never truly alone...
Wow, izzy. Thats lucky about you never having lived alone. The only time my mom was alone was during the week while I was at college. She went from her parents house, to a roommate, to living with my dad and me, and then me alone.
I'm more of a dog person. They allow small dogs here, but, as I posted before, I'm moving back to NY after my mom passes, and I know a lot of buildings in NY dont allow dogs, so I have to see where I end up. If the building I end up in does allow dogs, I think I'd like to get a dog.
Mitch
I'm more of a dog person. They allow small dogs here, but, as I posted before, I'm moving back to NY after my mom passes, and I know a lot of buildings in NY dont allow dogs, so I have to see where I end up. If the building I end up in does allow dogs, I think I'd like to get a dog.
Mitch
As an indication of how this is all consuming:
As everyone knows, baseball season starts in less than a month. Usually I spend $200 to get the MLB extra inning package, but, as I'm more than likely moving before baseball season is over, I dont think I'm going to shell out the cash, as I have other expenses.
The presidential election: As everyone who reads my posts is aware, I'm a Democrat. Usually, I'd be eagerly looking forward to it, posting in the P and R. I still hope Obama wins, but it wont affect me the way the elections of 2000, 2004, and 2008 did if he doesnt win. I will go, cast my vote, and go on with my life. It isnt life or death to me, I've had my life and death experience already,which will affect me far more than the outcome of any election in politics.
Mitch
As everyone knows, baseball season starts in less than a month. Usually I spend $200 to get the MLB extra inning package, but, as I'm more than likely moving before baseball season is over, I dont think I'm going to shell out the cash, as I have other expenses.
The presidential election: As everyone who reads my posts is aware, I'm a Democrat. Usually, I'd be eagerly looking forward to it, posting in the P and R. I still hope Obama wins, but it wont affect me the way the elections of 2000, 2004, and 2008 did if he doesnt win. I will go, cast my vote, and go on with my life. It isnt life or death to me, I've had my life and death experience already,which will affect me far more than the outcome of any election in politics.
Mitch
Jagermeistered
Level of Tangerine Feather
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2007
- Messages
- 11,944
- Points
- 38
Who's your baseball team, Mitch?
The Braves.
I had a really bad day. When I got to the home, I found out that my mom has been abusing the staff physically and emotionally. She's been swearing at them, hitting, spitting, punching, biting, etc. Luckily, they are used to it as many residents do this. I was there two and a half hours, and she said almost nothing to me. I' m absolutely drained. Except for this Sat when I go to Philly to see my dad, I'm going to show up at the home every day until she passes. Hopefully she will have some lucidity, and if not, I know that I supported her until the end.
Mitch
I had a really bad day. When I got to the home, I found out that my mom has been abusing the staff physically and emotionally. She's been swearing at them, hitting, spitting, punching, biting, etc. Luckily, they are used to it as many residents do this. I was there two and a half hours, and she said almost nothing to me. I' m absolutely drained. Except for this Sat when I go to Philly to see my dad, I'm going to show up at the home every day until she passes. Hopefully she will have some lucidity, and if not, I know that I supported her until the end.
Mitch
I'm so sorry that you are going through such a horrible time. 
You should be proud of being such a good son and know that these last days are not who your mother is/was.
When you get to NY, come to a gathering. I'll bring ladder. 😉
You should be proud of being such a good son and know that these last days are not who your mother is/was.When you get to NY, come to a gathering. I'll bring ladder. 😉
Best wishes to you during this difficult time. It's no fun to be alone. Know that you're being a great son and doing everything you can. One can't askfor any more than that.
A thought...once you settle in after your move to NY, spring for the MLB package for the remainder of the season.
A thought...once you settle in after your move to NY, spring for the MLB package for the remainder of the season.
bill, thanks for your blessing and prayers, my friend. Yes, it is terribly emotionally draining.
Thank you, Ayla, I appreciate your good wishes.
What you said about my being proud is interesting. My aunt, my dad, you, and others, talk about what a good son I am. While I know this, I dont like to put a feather in my cap, so to say. My mom has been a wonderful mom to me, so I feel she is deservant of how I've been there for her in her last days.
I just had a very emotional conversation with my dad. I think his demeanor has changed toward me because he felt for many years that I just viewed him as a financial support for me. I think we were both wrong. He is showing far more emotion and support than he ever has, and I know now that I have to love him as my father, and not just someone who helps me out.
After I got off the phone with him, I lied down in my living room and cried for a long time. I seriously wish I could get the fuck out of here, and go to NY. I cant for a few reasons. I cant move my mom in her condition, and I also need to pack. Sigh! I told my dad tonight that moving to Lancaster was the biggest mistake I ever made. He knows I was wrong for moving here, but one of his favorite sayings is "We cant undo the past, we can only change the present and future".
I'm feeling very ambivalent about my mom's situation. The nurses say that medically she seems okay, is eating, etc, but she's miserable in the nursing home. I dont like that I cant be there to support her the way I was in the hospital. As much as I want to hang on to her, I dont want her to suffer. If she's suffering, I want her to go gently and quickly.
I'm going to busy myself tonight by trying to watch a movie. Each day brings a new challenge, I know. I just hope and pray that whenever God is ready to take my mom, God does so with the least possible suffering.
Mitch
Thank you, Ayla, I appreciate your good wishes.
What you said about my being proud is interesting. My aunt, my dad, you, and others, talk about what a good son I am. While I know this, I dont like to put a feather in my cap, so to say. My mom has been a wonderful mom to me, so I feel she is deservant of how I've been there for her in her last days.
I just had a very emotional conversation with my dad. I think his demeanor has changed toward me because he felt for many years that I just viewed him as a financial support for me. I think we were both wrong. He is showing far more emotion and support than he ever has, and I know now that I have to love him as my father, and not just someone who helps me out.
After I got off the phone with him, I lied down in my living room and cried for a long time. I seriously wish I could get the fuck out of here, and go to NY. I cant for a few reasons. I cant move my mom in her condition, and I also need to pack. Sigh! I told my dad tonight that moving to Lancaster was the biggest mistake I ever made. He knows I was wrong for moving here, but one of his favorite sayings is "We cant undo the past, we can only change the present and future".
I'm feeling very ambivalent about my mom's situation. The nurses say that medically she seems okay, is eating, etc, but she's miserable in the nursing home. I dont like that I cant be there to support her the way I was in the hospital. As much as I want to hang on to her, I dont want her to suffer. If she's suffering, I want her to go gently and quickly.
I'm going to busy myself tonight by trying to watch a movie. Each day brings a new challenge, I know. I just hope and pray that whenever God is ready to take my mom, God does so with the least possible suffering.
Mitch
Last edited:
Thanks for your good wishes, unit.
I could do what you suggested about the mlb package. It really depends on how long my mom lives, and when I move. I know I have to be out of here July 31 if I dont want to sign another year's lease. The curveball is going to be.. and I doubt this will happen.. but.. if my mom were to outlive what the doctors are saying, I might be in a quandry with my living situation. I've heard some patients with brain cancer can live 6 to 9 months. The Drs dont think that will happen with my mom, but as none of us are God, we cant predict exactly what will happen.
Mitch
I could do what you suggested about the mlb package. It really depends on how long my mom lives, and when I move. I know I have to be out of here July 31 if I dont want to sign another year's lease. The curveball is going to be.. and I doubt this will happen.. but.. if my mom were to outlive what the doctors are saying, I might be in a quandry with my living situation. I've heard some patients with brain cancer can live 6 to 9 months. The Drs dont think that will happen with my mom, but as none of us are God, we cant predict exactly what will happen.
Mitch
Sigh!
My aunt the astrologer called me three times in ten minutes. GRRRRR! its like, finish what you say, and dont call back. She doesnt get that every time the phone rings, I think God Forbid its the nursing home telling me my mom has passed away. I mean, I know that people are going to call, its just.. multiple calls in a short time, especially from the same person, get me on edge, because of the circumstance.
Mitch
My aunt the astrologer called me three times in ten minutes. GRRRRR! its like, finish what you say, and dont call back. She doesnt get that every time the phone rings, I think God Forbid its the nursing home telling me my mom has passed away. I mean, I know that people are going to call, its just.. multiple calls in a short time, especially from the same person, get me on edge, because of the circumstance.
Mitch
