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Curroupt a Wish

Granted, you decide to simply shave your hair off altogether and thus get rid of the problem.

I wish you would draw a smiley on the back of your now bald head
 
granted, but its a smiley of a stick figure

I wish for some chocolate ice cream
 
Granted you know russian... but only the sentence "the russian mob is a bunch of pussies, and you do not have the balls to hit me."


I wish I knew what was wrong with her.
 
Granted, but there's nothing that you can do about it.

I wish I had the pain go away.
 
granted, but it goes somewhere where you least expect it

I wish for some chocolate milk
 
Granted, but it's been sitting in the sun for six hours and is all curdled and full of bugs.



I wish for freshly made scrambled eggs and bacon.
 
granted, but the eggs came from dead fish, and bacon from Wilbur


I wish for some steak tacos
 
Granted, but they are five weeks old and poisoned.

I wish for a PS3
 
Granted, but you have to put it together yourself and half the pieces are missing.


I wish both Wild Card Plyoff games today are really good games.
 
Granted, but you won't get to see them

I wish for some soda
 
Granted, but before you can take a sip, a gorilla leaps out, beats you up and steals it from you.


I wish this year is better than last year.
 
Granted, but you die at the end of the year

I wish to get back on that gorilla
 
Granted, but the gorilla has friends with him and they beat you down, steal your wallet and take your car for a joyride in the country.



I wish to be immune to all diseases.
 
Granted, but you start suffering from mental illness instead

I wish for a chocolate bunny :chocrabbit:
 
Granted. You will receive a furry bunny dipped in chocolate any minute now.

I wish all of the work shit I need to do this month would magically get done.
 
Granted, it will be "magically done" by you, thanks to your new ability to work without breaks nor sleep!

I wish I didn't have to go back to school in a few days
 
Granted, you had to be in school last Friday and you're screwed for missing it.

I wish it was warm enough to go biking.
 
granted but you have to work and by the time you are off it is cold again

i wish there was something i could do about it.
 
Granted, it will help if you cut off a foot 🙂

I wish I had more monies
 
Granted. But it's Zimbabwe dollars, and a million doesn't get you a loaf of bread.

I wish the Lost season premiere was on right now.
 
Granted, but your power goes out right at the beginning and doesn't come back on until it's over.

I wish I wasn't so bored right now.
 
Granted. You are being chased by a wild boar and he's gaining on you.

I wish I had a private chef.
 
Granted. In fact, he's so private, he refuses to share any of his dishes with you.


I wish wintertime would go away forever.
 
Granted. But oops! No wintertime means the ice caps melt, and we all drown.

I wish the work day was 5 hours long.
 
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